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Seymour Simmons

2009-07-08T04:13:22Z

24.111.216.250: sam said he get to work for the goverment agian

{{factions|sector7}}
:''Agent Simmons is a [[human]] from the [[Movie (franchise)|2007 movie franchise]] in the [[Live-action film series|live-action film]] [[continuity family]].''

[[Image:Simmonsthatwouldbecrazy.jpg|right|250px|thumb|Pause for effect...pause for effect...pause for effect...]]
Agent '''Seymour Simmons''' is the head officer of [[Sector Seven]]'s Field Agents. His family has been in Sector Seven since day one, when his great-grandfather helped dig [[Megatron (Movie)|the Ice Man]] out of the Arctic. He might come off as [[Sentinel Prime (Animated)|a jerk]], but he takes this work very personally. After all, it's in his blood.

He's just a smidge off his nut—eccentric, weird, crazy, whatever you want to call it. He's strange, and he wears Hawaiian underwear, Sector Seven undershirts, and clip-on ties.

He is the son of [[Felix Simmons|Felix]] <ref>''Revenge of the Fallen''</ref> and [[Tova Simmons]]<ref>''The Veiled Threat''</ref>.

{{bigquote|Yes, well...he's very strange.|[[John Keller]] on Simmons|''[[Transformers (2007)|Transformers]]''}}

==Fiction==
===Sector Seven ARG===
Seymour Simmons is a fictional character in a fictional Transformers movie produced by the ''real'' Sector Seven, masterminded by [[Reggie Simmons]]. {{storylink|Sector Seven (game)}}

===IDW ''Transformers'' movie comics===
[[Image:MoviePrequel4_Simmons_familyhistory.jpg|thumb|left|350px| It's not so much a circle as it is a straight line]]

In 2003, Simmons led a team of Sector Seven agents in an attempt to capture [[Bumblebee (Movie)|Bumblebee]], then known as NBE-2. {{storylink|Movie Prequel issue 3|Prime Directive (IDW) issue 3}} The attempt involved luring him into a trap using an artificial isotope derived from the sub-atomic matter of the [[All Spark|cube]], which put out an almost identical energy signature to that of the cube. After the team spent two days waiting in the New Mexico desert, Bumblebee appeared, followed by the Decepticons [[Barricade (Movie)|Barricade]], [[Blackout (Movie)|Blackout]], and [[Starscream (Movie)|Starscream]]. Thanks to the Decepticons, who destroyed several Apache helicopters and tried to hack into Sector Seven's network, Simmons's plan to capture Bumblebee failed horribly. {{storylink|Movie Prequel issue 4|Prime Directive (IDW) issue 4}}
{{-}}

===''Transformers'' (2007 film)===
:''Actor:'' [[John Turturro]] (English) [[Yūichi Nagashima]] (Japanese-language dub voice)

[[Image:Movie2007_Simmons_badge.jpg|thumb|250px| Eat it]]

Agent Simmons went to the Witwicky residence when Sector Seven suspected that [[Sam Witwicky]] had made contact with an [[Non-Biological Extraterrestrial|N.B.E.]] they were tracking. Taking Sam and [[Mikaela Banes]] into custody, he got too into the bad cop role, threatening Sam with life imprisonment, threatening Mikaela's father's parole, and revealing Mikaela's own criminal record. This strategy nearly succeeded...until a seriously pissed off [[Optimus Prime (Movie)|Optimus Prime]] decided to pay Sam and Mikaela's bail—by jumping right in front of their SUV, lifting it off the ground, and tearing the roof off. Although Simmons tried to call for calm, the [[Autobot|Autobots]] easily disarmed the agents. To Simmons's credit, he himself remained calm, while the guy to his left looked like he was going to wet himself.

[[Image:Movie2007_Bumblebee_lubricates_Simmons.JPG|left|250px|thumb|Dear America. Please Stop. Love, Germany.]]

Prime attempted to interrogate Simmons, who revealed that the only communication he was authorized to have with the N.B.E.s was to tell them he wasn't authorized to communicate with them. He also refused to answer any questions from Sam and Mikaela about Sector Seven or how they knew of the Autobots. Annoyed by his attitude, [[Bumblebee (Movie)|Bumblebee]] released [[lubricant]] on him, and then Mikaela had Simmons strip as punishment for threatening her father. Simmons had little to worry about when he was handcuffed to a pole, as a fellow agent had already alerted their confederates. Most of the Autobots managed to elude Sector Seven, but Bumblebee was captured when he saved Sam and Mikaela from a fall.

[[Image:Movie2007_Simmons_FWOOP.jpg|thumb|250px|Hooch is crazy...]]

After arriving at [[Hoover Dam]] (and presumably taking the ''longest'' shower of his life), Agent Simmons, in a new, clean, and higher-in-authority uniform, and trying the awkward role of good cop, told Sam and Mikaela that they may have gotten off on the wrong foot. Taking them to see the [[Megatron (Movie)|Mega Man]], Simmons was told of Megatron's plans by Sam. However, [[Frenzy (Movie)|Frenzy]] had infiltrated the dam and sent a message to the [[Decepticon|Decepticons]], causing [[Starscream (Movie)|Starscream]] to attack. Sam urged Simmons to release Bumblebee, saying he would help, but Simmons stubbornly refused. [[William Lennox|Captain Lennox]] decided to apply some armed persuasion, which Simmons still refused to heed, leading to a standoff between the rangers and Sector Seven agents. The rangers won. After Bumblebee reformatted the Cube, Simmons, [[John Keller|Secretary Keller]], [[Maggie Madsen]], and [[Glen Whitmann]] went to the dam's archives, where they managed to send out an S.O.S. via an old radio in there, while Keller and Simmons provided cover fire against an attacking Frenzy. {{storylink|Transformers (2007)|Transformers (2007)}}
{{-}}

===IDW ''Transformers'' movie comics===
Simmons, Banachek and John Keller were on their way to Mission City when [[Starscream (Movie)|Starscream]] attacked Hoover Dam. {{storylink|The Reign of Starscream Issue Number Two}}

[[Image:Alliance1_Simmons_Lennox_Epps.jpg|left|thumb|300px|Don't f**k with The Jesus!]]

Arriving shortly after the battle in Mission City, Simmons asked [[William Lennox]] and [[Robert Epps]] to join Sector Seven; they agreed after Sam inadvertently called Epps while in conversation with Simmons, which sort of ruined Lennox's excuse. The next day, Simmons informed [[Professor Vine]] that he had one month to study the defeated Decepticons before they were dumped in the [[Laurentian Abyss]]. He also suggested they wake up "[[Wreckage (Movie)|sleeping beauty]]" to see if he had anything to offer. When the scientist worried that Wreckage couldn't be re-activated, especially not since [[Salazar]] was lost, Simmons called Lennox, saying the soldier had friends that could "make him" wake up. {{storylink|Alliance issue 1}}

Before the Autobots arrived at the [[Nevada]] desert facility to escort the convoy carrying the Decepticon bodies away, Simmons agreed with Vine about having to dump the Decepticons into the sea, grousing that the aliens turned a city into a battleground and now they had to throw a treasure trove of information away. While they reminisced about how Salazar was able to learn from Wreckage and create the [[Landmine (Movie)|L.M.-1 units]], Simmons was dismissive and callous about the sentience of the Cybertronians, refusing to refer to Wreckage by his name, preferring to call him N.B.E.-3. At Optimus Prime's behest, Vine took the surviving All Spark shard for safekeeping, fearing it might reactivate the dead Megatron.
Simmons and [[Salani]] persuaded Vine to take the fragment underground to hide it from any Decepticons that might still be skulking about, but as soon as they entered the main holding chamber, the fragment flew out of Simmons's hands and revived Wreckage. Wreckage rampaged through the base, destroying the L.M.-1s and fighting Starscream in a struggle leading to numerous deaths. {{storylink|Alliance issue 2}} While secretly taking [[Frenzy (Movie)|Frenzy]]'s head, which had fallen out of Starscream's cockpit, Simmons was left to wonder about the Transformers' sense of morality before being relieved of his duties by John Keller. {{storylink|Alliance issue 3}}

===''The Veiled Threat'' prequel novel===
{{Note|The events of ''The Veiled Threat'' take place during [[IDW Publishing]]'s ''[[Alliance (comic)|Alliance]]'' comic.}}

After Sector Seven was shut down, Simmons was not invited to join [[NEST]], despite his best efforts. Simmons was convinced that it was because he had been mean to that Witwicky kid and his car stealing girlfriend, even though the official reason was concern that he might be a little unstable (probably the actual reason). Convinced that the Autobots were equally attempting to invade Earth, Simmons managed to save (stealing is so pejorative) documents from Sector Seven, as well as Frenzy's head, in the hopes of learning everything he could to stop both factions and save the planet. Although his pension took care of his needs, he decided to work in his mother's deli, where every day he would take orders from people with stupid tastes in Italian meat. One night while working, Frenzy began to spazz out of control and nearly fried the building's electrical system, forcing Simmons to shut him down. After a mild complaint by his landlord, Simmons decided to relocate Frenzy and the documents to the basement of his mother's deli, the safest alternative he could think of.{{storylink|The Veiled Threat}}

===''Revenge of the Fallen'' movie===
:''Actor:'' [[John Turturro]] (English)
[[Image:Rotf t2 simmonsclassified.jpg|thumb|My mother's sandwich recipe is classified. ''Real'' effing classified.]]
Simmons set up a website, ''[[GiantEffingRobots.com]]'', under the alias [[Robo-Warrior]], where he developed a rivalry with ''[[The Real Effing Deal]]''. One day, after his hometown of [[New York City]] had been attacked by [[Decepticon]] [[protoform]]s and [[The Fallen]] had broadcast a threat across the world, ''The Real Effing Deal'''s webmaster, [[Leo Spitz]], walked into his deli. Leo tried to be civil about their rivalry, as he recognized he needed Robo-warrior's aid, but Simmons initially feigned ignorance of his site and then began criticizing Leo's work. Then, when [[Sam Witwicky]] and [[Mikaela Banes]] walked through his door, visibly shocked at whom they were dealing with, Simmons vented further, admonishing Sam over how [[Megatron (Movie)|N.B.E. 01]] was ''still'' alive and blaming them for the loss of his job.

Once Simmons heard how Sam needed ''his'' help, he closed his shop early to show them something top secret. He opened a hidden stairway in the cold storage room that led to a room filled with classified files (as well as Frenzy's head), which he'd taken for himself before Sector Seven closed its doors. Simmons revealed the [[Cyberglyphics]] Sam was hallucinating about could be found all over the globe, a clear sign the [[Transformer]]s had visited the planet long before the [[All Spark]] and Megatron. Simmons explained he had been keen to investigate evidence of other Transformers lying inert on Earth, but Sector Seven had denied him permission, deeming it an ''obsession''. Mikaela brought [[Wheelie (ROTF)|Wheelie]] into the room, and he identified several of the machines in Simmons's photographs as [[Seeker (ROTF)|Seekers]], who had come to Earth ages ago searching for something.

Journeying to the nearest known Seeker at the Smithsonian, Simmons hatched a plan to get past security after hours that essentially involved him tasering the guards: Simmons was successful in taking down the guard to whom he'd assigned himself, but Leo wound up tasering himself too. Simmons had to drag him to where Sam, Mikaela and Wheelie had detected [[energon radiation]], and they found their Seeker was an SR-71 Blackbird. Sam's All Spark fragment reactivated the jet, who was actually the former Decepticon [[Jetfire (ROTF)|Jetfire]]. The grouchy Seeker used a [[space bridge]] to transport them to [[Egypt]], where he told them the story of the [[The Fallen]], the [[solar harvester]], and the [[Matrix of Leadership]] needed to power it, which was hidden in the [[Tomb of the Primes]]. The four humans plus Wheelie, [[Bumblebee (Movie)|Bumblebee]], [[Skids (ROTF)|Skids]] and [[Mudflap (ROTF)|Mudflap]] went searching for the Matrix to resurrect [[Optimus Prime (Movie)|Optimus Prime]].

Simmons used his intelligence skills to evade detection, as The Fallen's demand for Sam's capture made Sam a wanted man. He contacted [[NEST]], telling them to bring Optimus's body to Egypt. Then he got Sam across the [[Jordan]]ian border, mainly because the border guard liked New York and was amiable enough to let his "family" pass. Sam worked out the only clue to the tomb and uncovered the Matrix in [[Petra]]. As Bumblebee drove them back to Egypt, they were attacked by [[Starscream (Movie)|Starscream]]. Sam ran off to revive Optimus, who was being protected by NEST in ruins near the [[pyramid]]s, while Simmons played decoy and drove in Skids to a quarry. Simmons relished his supporting role, proclaiming he was "One man, abandoned by the country he loves," despite Leo's presence.

Simmons and Leo were driven by Skids and Mudflap into a quarry near the pyramids, where they witnessed the [[Constructicon (ROTF)|Constructicon]]s combine into [[Devastator (ROTF)|Devastator]]. Simmons avoided being sucked into the giant's mouth by running for his legs. As Devastator clambered up the [[Great Pyramid of Giza]], Simmons retrieved a radio from a Jordanian helicopter that Megatron had downed, which he used to contact the [[United States Navy]]. Simmons followed Devastator up the pyramid-despite Leo's protests-with the radio in hand, wheedling his way around a captain's tedious demand as to how he knew of their top secret [[Wikipedia:railgun|railgun]] that were based on studies by the US military. As he climbed the pyramid, Simmons probably became the only human to acknowledge Devastator had two wrecking balls resembling the male scrotum. After the Navy successfully fired on the behemoth, Simmons gained military backup for NEST, whose phone signals had been jammed by [[Soundwave (ROTF)|Soundwave]]. After Optimus was raised from the dead and The Fallen's defeat, Simmons was congratulated by Lennox for his aid in bringing down the Decepticon. he was also offered to join nest by lennox personally it was an offer that he accepted. {{storylink|Revenge of the Fallen (film)}}
{{-}}

==Toys==
===Transformers (2007)===
[[Image:Movie ScreenBattles Sector7figures.jpg|right|250px|thumb|Unposable weirdo.]]
*'''Capture of Bumblebee''' (Screen Battles, 2007)
**''Japanese ID number:'' '''SB-04'''

:This ''Screen Battles'' pack comes with a redecoed Camaro Concept Deluxe class Bumblebee featuring a more accurate grey color scheme for his robot mode parts and a silver-painted face and toes. The pack also comes with non-posable figurines of [[Sector Seven]] agent Seymour Simmons and two Sector Seven soldiers, one carrying a cryo-freezing cannon and one carrying a grenade launcher.

:This set comes in a special window box featuring a diorama background of the scene where Bumblebee is captured by Sector Seven forces.

{{-}}

==Notes==
*According to the director's commentary on the ''Transformers'' DVD, Turturro based his performance as Simmons on [[Michael Bay]].

==References==
<references/>

{{DEFAULTSORT:Simmons, Seymour}}
[[Category:Humans]]
[[Category:Movie characters]]
[[Category:Revenge of the Fallen characters]]
[[Category:Sector Seven]]

Barack Obama

2009-07-08T04:11:41Z

24.111.216.250:

:''Barack Obama is a [[human]] in the [[Revenge of the Fallen (franchise)|Revenge of the Fallen]] [[live-action film series]].''

[[Image:Obama_interview.jpg|thumb|right|300px|"Mr. President, with an alien invasion upon us, the American people want to know: ''Where is [[Wikipedia:Tom Jones (singer)|Tom Jones]]?"'']]

'''Barack "Barry"<ref name="joke">[http://www.therealeffingdeal.com/blog/obamania-but-will-he-elect-to-take-the-search-seriously/#more-109 "OBAMAMANIA!" blog post] by Sharkatron3000 on TheRealEffingDeal.com</ref> Obama''' is a [[President of the United States]] who came into the office at a time of national and global peril. Under [[President of the United States#Transformers (2007)|his predecessor]], a crisis had exploded in the form of [[Megatron (Movie)|N.B.E. 01]] escaping, the [[All Spark]] being lost, and a swarm of [[Transformer|alien combatants]] waging a clandestine, highly unconventional war in hotspots across the [[Earth|world]].

When he was running for election, Obama had blown off a question about alien visitors with a joke.<ref name="joke" /> But as President, he has begun to act behind the scenes, fearing that the [[Autobot]]s' presence is attracting the [[Decepticon]]s. Represented by his [[Theodore Galloway|National Security Advisor]], Obama's policies are a constant thorn in the side of the [[NEST|joint human/Autobot military force]], which finds itself increasingly hamstrung in direct proportion to the gravity of the Decepticon threat. Obama's dedication to keeping all options open (including "diplomatic" ones) even when facing a race of [[Rampage (ROTF)|animalistic murder-machines]] sits quite poorly with [[William Lennox|the]] [[Robert Epps|soldiers]] tasked with eliminating the invaders.

But perhaps even more questionable is Obama's practice of "[[Wikipedia:Video blogging|vlogging]]," a trend that [[Leo Spitz]] has claimed credit for.<ref>[http://www.therealeffingdeal.com/blog/college/ "College" blog post] by Leo Spitz on TheRealEffingDeal.com</ref>

{{quote|...we aren’t sure Barry is so ready to tackle the real issues of EXTRATERRESTRIAL life, especially when it involves an INVASION FORCE!|[[Sharsky|Sharkatron3000]]|[[The Real Effing Deal|The Real Effing Deal.com]]}}

==Fiction==
===''Revenge of the Fallen'' (franchise)===
[[Sharsky|Sharkatron3000]] posted a clip on [[The Real Effing Deal]] from an interview of Obama when he was still running for president.
{{quote|If you are elected and you learned that the government knew aliens had visited Earth, and the public didn't know...would you be sure the public found out?|Channel 2 reporter}}
{{quote|It depends on what these aliens were like, and whether they were Democrats or Republicans.|Barack Obama}}
Sharkatron3000 took the interview as evidence that the President is completely unprepared for the prospect of alien visitors, because he treated the question as a joke.

Later, Leo Spitz cited the President's actions as a justification for his own video-blogging.{{storylink|The Real Effing Deal}}

===''Revenge of the Fallen'' movie===

Even though [[NEST]] had successfully destroyed the Decepticon infiltrators in [[Shanghai]], [[China]], the new President of the United States was less than impressed with the destruction caused during the operation. President Obama sent Director [[Theodore Galloway]] to [[Diego Garcia]] to outline the White House's criticisms of NEST's operations and their alliance with the alien Autobots, in particular [[Optimus Prime (Movie)|Optimus Prime]]'s open invitation for Autobot refugees to come to [[Earth]]. They feared that reason the Decepticons being on Earth was to seek vengeance upon the Autobots and their allies, and when [[Morshower|General Morshower]] attempted to defend [[William Lennox|Major Lennox]] and his men's judgement by stating they were above reproach, Galloway stated that as far as the President was concerned, ''nobody'' was above reproach. He directly asked Optimus Prime that if the President felt that the United States' national security was better served by having the Autobots leave Earth, would they do so peacefully? Optimus Prime agreed, but bluntly told Galloway to pass along a message to the President: What if the Autobots leave, and the humans are ''wrong?''

Soon afterwards, Optimus Prime was killed in battle defending [[Sam Witwicky]], and [[The Fallen]] began his invasion of Earth. Among the casualties were [[Paris]], [[France]], and the aircraft carrier [[United States Navy#U.S.S. Theodore Roosevelt (CVN-71)|U.S.S. ''Theodore Roosevelt'']]. Appalled with this loss of life stemming from an alien civil war, the President unwittenly gave galloway the power to shut down nest temperaly until a plain could be fought up. Galloway also revealed that the President was considering The Fallen's demands that Sam Witwicky be turned over to the Decepticons to spare Earth, in the name of seeking a "diplomatic" option.

If NEST had complied, this could have easily meant the Earth's destruction, as it would have bought The Fallen enough time to activate the [[solar harvester]]. But, understanding the gravity if not the details of the situation, Lennox only played along until he found an opportunity: While NEST and the corpse of Prime were being flown back to base, Lennox used an apparent emergency to trick Galloway into parachuting out. Lennox then took his team of humans and Autobots rogue, flying to [[Egypt]] to meet up with Sam and [[Seymour Simmons]], who claimed to be able to resurrect Prime. This promise was fulfilled, which led to the defeat of The Fallen and the salvation of the Earth. Obama's reaction to this disobedient heroism was good and decided to let autobots stay on earth and fired galloway at sigestion of chief of staff it was beacuse he was going to do a millitry option anyway. {{storylink|Revenge of the Fallen (film)|Revenge of the Fallen}}

==Notes==
* While on the campaign trail, the [[Wikipedia:Barack Obama|real-life Barack Obama]] met [[Michael Bay]] by chance in an airport, and the two had a mutually-complimentary conversation. Inspired by this encounter, Bay made a late-stage decision to add Obama's name and image to a brief scene in ''Revenge of the Fallen''.<ref>[http://www.digitalspy.co.uk/movies/a160272/michael-bay-obama-likes-my-movies.html Michael Bay: 'Obama likes my movies'] at Digital Spy, and [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NfT7ZF_AUk8 Bay telling the story at a press conference.]</ref> It is unknown whether it occurred to Bay that the movie's otherwise-unnamed President is essentially a villain whose Earth-dooming directives mirror criticisms of Obama's foreign policy.

* In an [[Transformers_(Titan_Magazine)#Alternate_universe|alternate timeline]] presented in the UK Titan comics, in which the Decepticons were victorious in the battle of [[Mission City]], Obama did not become the next President of the United States. Instead, when the previous President was killed, fictional Vice President [[Theodore Allen]] succeeded him. {{storylink|Transformers Comic issue 14}}

* The real-life Obama was the inspiration for much of [[Transcendent Technomorph|TransTech]] [[Optimus Prime (TransTech)|Optimus Prime]]'s [[bio]].

==Footnotes==
<references/>

{{DEFAULTSORT: Obama, Barack}}
[[Category: Humans]]
[[Category: Real people]]
[[Category: Politicians]]
[[Category: United States of America]]
[[Category: Revenge of the Fallen characters]]

Barack Obama

2009-07-08T04:03:41Z

24.111.216.250: /* Revenge of the Fallen movie */