Editing The Transformers: The Movie (first draft)

{{apocrypha}}
[[Image:TfMovie-FirstDraftScriptAuction.jpg|thumb|right|250px]]
Do you know ''[[The Transformers: The Movie]]''? Of course you do! Until the live action movies came along, it was the most well known piece of Transformers media. 

Well, this ''isn't'' that movie. 

This is about the initial script of that movie. Written by [[Ron Friedman]] between late [[1984]] and early [[1985]], this 212 page script is radically different from the finished film. After it was rejected by [[Hasbro]], Friedman was told to start over with a new draft. For many years the only details about this script came from comments by writer [[Flint Dille]] who called it "incoherent" <ref>"[https://web.archive.org/web/20200128201208/http://cybertronchronicle.freewebspace.com/60-astrominutes/flint-dille/flint-dille-2.html The Flint Dille Interview Part II]</ref> and suggested that "nobody really felt it was [well] structured"<ref> "Metrodome Transformers: The Movie — Ultimate Edition Interview with Story Consultant Flint Dille" </ref> . In [[2022]] after years of speculation the script surfaced at the fan convention TFNATION 2022 in a panel hosted by [[Jim Sorenson]] and [[Chris McFeely]].

==Background==
[[Image:TFM-FirstDraftOutline.jpeg|thumb|150px|The first page of the outline. If you bought this in 2010 please let us know.]]
In [[1983]], Friedman was hired by [[Sunbow Productions]] as a writer on G.I Joe, scripting the five episode miniseries that opened the cartoon. Positive feedback on this lead him to become the "additional dialogue" editor for Transformers. <ref> "[https://toddmatthy.com/2013/12/31/he-killed-optimus-prime-an-interview-with-ron-friedman-writer-of-transformers-the-movie/ He Killed Optimus Prime: An Interview With Ron Friedman the Writer of Transformers:The Movie]</ref> As part of this, a clause in his contract stated that a Transformers movie would have to be based on a script he wrote. On 15 August 1984, two days after finishing the season 1 finale [[Heavy Metal War]], he wrote an outline which was revised several times over the next month.<ref>[https://comics.ha.com/itm/memorabilia/miscellaneous/transformers-the-movie-revised-script-treatment-sunbow-productions-inc-1984-/a/7027-93271.s Cover page of the revised script] </ref> The exact contents of this are still unknown. This 53 page outline was approved, and in November Friedman began writing the first draft, which was finished by February 1985. <ref> [https://comics.ha.com/itm/memorabilia/miscellaneous/transformers-the-movie-script-group-sunbow-productions-inc-1984-85-total-3-items-/a/7027-93280.s Cover page of the first draft script]</ref> It is unknown how much influence Hasbro had over this script; Friedman was asked to include Optimus Prime dying after Hasbro higher-ups were taken by the idea of Duke dying in the also in-production G.I. Joe movie, but much else is still speculation.  <ref> "[https://toddmatthy.com/2013/12/31/he-killed-optimus-prime-an-interview-with-ron-friedman-writer-of-transformers-the-movie/ He Killed Optimus Prime: An Interview With Ron Friedman the Writer of Transformers:The Movie]</ref> <ref>"[https://alonefancryinginthewilderness.blogspot.com/2012/07/from-archives-my-animated-conversation.html/ A Lone Fan Crying In The Wilderness My Animated Conversation With Buzz Dixon ]</ref> Friedman has said that he created [[Unicron/Generation 1 |Unicron]], [[Arcee (G1)|Arcee]], the [[Junkions]], the [[Sharkticons]], and the idea of Megatron being rebuilt into Galvatron.<ref> "[https://toddmatthy.com/2013/12/31/he-killed-optimus-prime-an-interview-with-ron-friedman-writer-of-transformers-the-movie/ He Killed Optimus Prime: An Interview With Ron Friedman the Writer of Transformers:The Movie]</ref> <ref>I Killed Optimus Prime, Ron Friedman page 42</ref>


We only have a broad idea of what happened after this script was submitted, save that Hasbro wasn't happy with it, though the specific reasons for this are unknown. Friedman (who was still paid for this draft)<ref> [https://toddmatthy.com/2013/12/31/he-killed-optimus-prime-an-interview-with-ron-friedman-writer-of-transformers-the-movie/ He Killed Optimus Prime: An Interview With Ron Friedman the Writer of Transformers:The Movie]</ref> claims it was because he focused too much on the villains. <ref>I Killed Optimus Prime, Ron Friedman page 169</ref>  Trying to fix the script, a copy was given to story editor Flint Dille and he was told to rework it. Dille ultimately deemed the script to be incoherent and, along with creative director [[Jay Bacal]], began work on a new script partially based on Freidman's. This script, [[The Secret of Cybertron]], was written in a week. It was also rejected.<ref> [https://web.archive.org/web/20200128201208/http://cybertronchronicle.freewebspace.com/60-astrominutes/flint-dille/flint-dille-2.html The Flint Dille Interview Part II] </ref> On the 28th of March, Hasbro went back to Friedman and gave him a new outline and character list, essentially telling him to start over. The resulting draft would form the basis of film we know today (though with some notable differences).


==Synopsis==
The [[Decepticons]] are attacking an old steel mill that the [[Autobots]] plan to convert into a new facility. A defence is led by [[Ultra Magnus (G1)/Generation 1 cartoon continuity|Magnus]] who commands [[Kup (G1)/Generation 1 cartoon continuity|Tanker]], [[Hot Rod (G1)/Generation 1 cartoon continuity|Hot Rod]], [[Arcee (G1)/Generation 1 cartoon continuity|Arcee]], and [[Wheeljack (G1)/Generation 1 cartoon continuity|Wheeljack]]. Things are desperate for the Autobot forces. Meanwhile an old freight train driven by General Blaze and Rusty Steel transports Autobot reinforcements to the mill. The train is attacked by Decepticon jets led by [[Megatron (G1)/Generation 1 cartoon continuity|Megatron]]. On [[Optimus Prime (G1)/Generation 1 cartoon continuity|Prime's]] orders the Autobots fight off the oncoming jets. When [[Starscream (G1)/Generation 1 cartoon continuity|Starscream]] destroys the train tracks, it is revealed that the train is an Autobot called Rails who turns into a floating high tech bullet train which flies through the assembled troops. As the Decepticons overrun the mill, Prime commands Rails to transform again, this time into a massive fire breathing snake that destroys the enemy forces. Megatron challenges Prime to a fight. You know this part. Seriously, the fight is pretty much identical to the final film. The Autobots gather around the dying Prime. Starscream orders the Decepticons to retreat back to [[Cybertron (planet)|Cybertron]], taking the dying Megatron with them. Rusty tells them they can't declare Prime dead in the field and orders them back to headquarters for a full analysis. He also orders Wheeljack to begin building a ship to follow the Decepticons.

In space the Decepticons argue about who should be their new leader. Arriving at the Decepticon [[Hall of Heroes]] they begin to place Megatron's essence in an urn among their fallen leaders. A fight then breaks out over who’ll be his successor which destroys the hall and Megatron's essence is left to float into space as his body is destroyed.  Back on Earth, Prime is taken to the [[Autobot Headquarters]] and put on life support. The Autobots run into [[Daniel Witwicky (G1)|Daniel]], a young boy that idolises Rusty. Daniel sadly asks if Prime will make it only for his mother Ellen to show up and tell him she wants nothing to do with Rusty. An alarm sounds and everyone rushes to the dying leader. In space Megatron's essence floats helplessly as he begs to be restored. The ghostly voice of The Entity appears and takes him up on the offer as he is pulled towards the metal planet of [[Unicron/Generation 1|Unicron]]. He offers Megatron great power in servitude to him which the broken leader accepts. Megatron is bathed in light and rebuilt into the new form of [[Galvatron (G1)/Generation 1 cartoon continuity|Galvatron]]. The Entity sends him to Cybertron to convert the Decepticons.

As Optimus dies he names Magnus as his successor. Magnus is given the [[Matrix of Leadership|Matrix]] -a tiny, glowing version of Prime and becomes Ultra Magnus. Magnus' first order is for the Autobots to develop a defense system to protect Earth when the Decepticons return. On Cybertron the Decepticons are still fighting when a ray of light appears over them. Galvatron appears before them and tells them he is the reborn Megatron and they will now serve the Entity. He bathes them in light, turning them into the Entity's servants. The light begins covering all of Cybertron and transforming the entire populace into soldiers. At the Entity's command they fly off to attack Earth. As they leave Cybertron begins to collapse and the planet Unicron devours it, growing larger in the process. Galvatron silently vows to avenge his homeworld.

At their base the Autobots begin work on the Recontour Shield. Suddenly, [[Teletraan 1]] reports that Cybertron has been destroyed. Then an invading force of Decepticons appears and attacks the Autobots. Magnus raises the shields which manages to hold off the invaders. A furious Galvatron summons green lightning from the sky which destroys the shield. The Autobots retreat as the Decepticons melt the mountain. At the same time a separate attack has destroyed the space cruisers being built at the steel mill. Sometime later a [[Sweep (G1)|Sweep Party]] scours through the remains of the base, unaware of a makeshift Autobot camp hidden in a nearby ravine. From a [[Sky Spy]] the Autobots learn the Decepticons plan to cover Earth in an energy cage to drain its energy, then beam it into space, and they only have 96 hours before this process destroys the planet. Tanker and Hot Rod are sent to find new recruits while the others complete work on the only surviving space cruiser. As they leave the Sweeps find the base and Magnus sets up a diversion. Hound creates a holographic army which distracts them long enough to escape by raft.

In the desert Hot Rod and Tanker find [[Springer (G1)|Springer]] being attacked by Decepticon jets. It seems they have him until Springer turns the tide by jumping around causing their fire to hit each other and melt them together. Reunited, Springer tells them where to find more warriors. Heading to an oil refinery which hasn't yet been overrun they see a swarm of [[Insecticon (G1)|Insecticons]] overhead.  A fight ensues as they rush to the refinery. They are overwhelmed until the [[Dinobot (G1)|Dinobots]] appear and destroy them with their fire breath. At the refinery they meet Mentlar, a scientist that has created an "Immuno Stabilizer Field" which temporarily depowers the Entity's troops. Unfortunately they have already started to gain immunity to this. Leaving to reunite with Magnus, they run into [[Blurr (G1)|Blurr]], an ultra fast but slow talking Autobot.

Later at the Arctic, Galvatron's forces pick up the Autobots' signal as they attempt to launch the cruiser. Due to lack of space the Dinobots, Tanker and Hot Rod will have to ride on the outside of the ship. As they melt their way into the base Magnus initiates the launch. The Decepticon forces follow them into space. The Autobots are nearly trapped in the energy cage but Magnus’ piloting skills allows him to doge it at the last second while the Deceptions fly into the trap. As they fall back to Earth, The Entity appears and mocks Galvatron’s failure before giving him a new "aircraft carrier" spaceship.

On the cruiser, the humans try out Mentlar's new invention- the [[Exosuit|Exo-Suit]], a "METAL CAGE-LIKE OUTFIT" that grants users increased speed and strength. Suddenly, the Decepticon ship appears and opens fire on them. The group outside splits off and heads to a nearby asteroid to draw fire. [[Soundwave (G1)/Generation 1 cartoon continuity|Soundwave]] ejects [[Laserbeak (G1)/Generation 1 cartoon continuity|Laserbeak]] to follow them. Mentlar comes up with a plan to detonate "Photon Flares" to make it look like the ship was destroyed.  Galvatron senses Optimus Prime's essence in Magnus. As the ship lands the Autobots hurry to find Hot Rod and Tanker before the Decepitcons realise what happened, unaware that Laserbeak has already spotted them. Picking up their signal on a volcano-filled ridge they are attacked by the Decepticon fleet. The ensuing fight is interpreted by a sudden "Galactic Warp Hurricane" which threatens to tear the asteroid apart. [[Thundercracker (G1)/Generation 1 cartoon continuity|Thundercracker]] and [[Hook (G1)|Hook]] detonate explosives that blast Hot Rod and Tanker into space. The Decepticon ship is destroyed in the storm's debris, with Galvatron believing that his enemies have been destroyed. The Autobots retreat back to the cruiser as they head to the Shadow Nebula.

Hot Rod and Tanker land on an asteroid getting attacked by a robot squid in a sequence which is more or less the same as the final film so we can skim over it. In fact most of the Quintesson parts are similar. The cruiser crashes on the moon of Planet Unicorn. Back on Earth, Arcee and Wheeljack lead the other Autobots against the Decepticon Jets, trapping them by collapsing a freeway on them. Galvatron insults Starscream for his failures until The Entity demands they head to his planet to deal with the intruders. While the others repair the ship Mentlar surveys their surroundings finding a crystal scale which he takes as a specimen. Electricity flows from this scale into space as The Entity senses intruders.

Hot Rod and Tanker have been taken by the [[Sharkticons]] to their psychic masters the [[Quintessons]]. Prisoner [[Kranix|Granix]], a rock robot explains their cruel nature before he is put on trial and forced to fight to the death. As they watch him being devoured, Hot Rod thinks of a plan. Meanwhile examining the scale Mentlar realizes that it is part of the same organism that the Decepticons have been drawing power from. Galvatron leads the Decepticons to the moon, destroying what turns out to be "Robotic Doubles" "two-dimensional cut outs" of the Autobots (really). From a nearby mountain, Magnus leads Blurr and Mentlar in a suicide charge to try and give the others time to escape.

Thanks to the Dinobots, Hot Rod and Tanker escape from the Quintessons. Hot Rod forces their leader to use his mind scan to find his friends. They fly off into space after learning their friends are on the moon of Unicron. As Galvatron returns with more troops, Magnus begins his desperate last stand. In a fog bank Springer and the humans run into the [[Junkions]] who capture them. Back at the mountain a heavily wounded Magnus is the only survivor. He fights on until Galvatron finally kills him and then cuts Optimus’ Matrix out of him with a razor saw. With this he vows to destroy the Entity. However when Galvatron threatens to blow up The Entity if he isn’t released from servitude, it just laughs at him. So Galvatron detonates a bomb to destroy Unicron.

In a Junkion village their leader [[Wreck-Gar (G1)|Wreck-Gar]] calls for silence as the prisoners are tied to stakes. As they close in, Hot Rod and Tanker arrive and …. do something. We don't know what, that page of the script is missing. Probably the [[universal greeting]]. With everyone now allies, Wreck-Gar explains how his people have always fought the Entity hiding from it in the Veil of Fog. He takes them to an ancient computer containing the Junkions history. Ellen is able to decipher the data and realizes that the ancient Junkions created the Entity as their protector. (Yes, you read that right.) However it was corrupted by greed. Now the Decepticons have absorbed enough energy for the planet to break free of its orbit. But they also discover its one weakness located.... somewhere. That page of the script is also missing.

Unicron is unharmed and the planet transforms around Galvatron. The Entity reveals that it and Unicron are one and the same as it turns into a giant robot. At last free the Entity leaves to devour Earth. The Autobots land on the creature's throat and follow a channel the schematics say will lead them to its core. Inside they find that the entrance is so small that only Daniel is able to fit inside. Hot Rod suddenly gains an aura and realizes that the Matrix can destroy The Entity, and that Galvatron is still alive inside the massive robot. As the Entity reaches Earth, Hot Rod tries to convince Galvatron to help him destroy Unicron. He responds by trying to kill him with a Laser Knife. Hot Rod is only saved when Ellen appears and knocks the Decepticon over with her Exo-Suit, allowing Hot Rod to take the Matrix. Hot Rod races back to Daniel, who leaps into the core. The Matrix floods the room with light as Daniel is thrown out of the hole into his mothers arms. Galvatron is swept into space. As the Entity is torn apart the voice of Optimus tells it all evil shall be destroyed. Earth's energy is returned as the Autobots hold a parade for their new heroes.  


==Rediscovery==
In [[2010]] Ron Friedman auctioned off material from his time at Sunbow. Thanks to efforts spearheaded by Jim Sorenson, much of Freidman's material ends up in our possession. One of the things that doesn't is the first draft script and outline for Transformers The Movie. For the next decade we can only wonder about what it contained because it's never seen again. In October [[2020]] Flint Dille begins to clear out his storage for the first time in years. During this he finds a copy of this script (presumably the copy Hasbro had given him to punch up). <ref> [https://www.facebook.com/flintdlile/posts/pfbid0e7KEB5FPqTiE6XNVaNjWw9feYCnjCMcvv7vRG1VAocMrxHKobK83usYKDVdbtBhfl Flint Dilie's Facebook post finding the script]</ref>  Soon he contacts Sorenson to scan the script before he auctions it off. Two years later in [[2022]] with permission from Dille, Jim and fellow superfan Chris McFeely perform a panel at the fan convention TFNation 2022 where they give an overview of the script. Shortly afterward the Sunbow Marvel Archive published an in depth summary of the draft. The script was later made public for the first time in [[2023]], a little over a year after the panel.

==Cast==
===Autobots===
*[[Ultra Magnus (G1)/Generation 1 cartoon continuity|Magnus]] - A large Autobot with distinctive headgear. Still an old friend of Optimus. The big change is that he starts as Magnus and is reformatted into Ultra Magnus when he receives the Matrix. The script suggests that he turns into something like a "HARVESTER WITH THRESER BLADES or GASOLINE TRUCK WITH HUGE BATTERING RAM TYPE BUMPERS". We don't know if Hasbro had decided on releasing the Powered Convoy toy at this point or if Friedman knew this would be the case. Overall has a similar role in the final film apart from staying dead.
*[[Kup (G1)/Generation 1 cartoon continuity|Tanker]]- An "one eyed battle scarred old Autobot" soldier. Turns into a Sherman Tank. He's pretty much Kup in all but name and appearance.
*[[Hot Rod (G1)/Generation 1 cartoon continuity|Hot Rod]]-  Described bluntly as "a Luke Skywalker-young-man-on-the brink-of manhood sort of Autobot". Not a futuristic car but a "souped up, cut down "Hot Rod" version of, say, a Camaro". He's still responsible for Optimus' death, something that he blames himself for. He never becomes Rodimus Prime.
*[[Arcee (G1)/Generation 1 cartoon continuity|Arcee]]- An Autobot nurse. She's part of a terrible running gag with Wheeljack where despite being a competent soldier and saving him various times she is constantly berated for being a "shebot". He does apologise for this at the end though. More on that later.
*Rails- A giant triple changer snake that can turn into an old fashioned freight train and a futuristic high tech flying train. Also capable of breathing fire and shooting lasers from his eyes. It seems that this character may be an early version of Astrotrain from when the character was planned to be an Autobot. Friedman may have been told to include an unnamed "Autobot triple changer train" in the script and based on that limited description created Rails. In his autobiography Friedman when recounting the opening battle of this draft refers to Rails as Astrotrain (as well as claiming he created him... which seems unlikely), giving a certain amount of credibility to this theory.<ref>I Killed Optimus Prime, Ron Friedman page 169 -171 </ref>  
*[[Springer (G1)|Springer]]- At this stage not a triple changer yet and his personality is based on Arnold Schwarzenegger rather than Harrison Ford. Described as muscular. Has special jumping abilities (with an accompanying SPOONG sound) and since he's not a helicopter  yet, this power isn't completely redundant. His alt mode is suggested to be a "JET POWERED STEAM ROLLER" or a "MOBILE MISSLE LAUNCHER". First seen sparring with Mirage and Bluestreak at headquarters. His personality would be switched with that of Rusty Steel in the second draft.
*Chemico- "A walking laboratory" with "CLEAR GLASS TUBES AND INTERLACING GLASS PIPING in his torso" who shows up briefly to create a smokescreen, allowing the Autobots to escape from the Decepticons. It is clear from the description given that Friedman simply needed to have the heroes escape and created Chemico on the spot to allow that to happen.
*Mentlar- A Carl Sagan style scientist with a large head and "ALPHA-WAVE.STYLE HEADGEAR", capable of firing physic blasts from his headband. Described as having long delicate fingers and transforming into a RADAR DISH TRUCK. He was a former director of research at the Cybertronic Institute of Technometry. Obviously he would be replaced with Perceptor in the second draft. It's also possible that he was always intended to be Perceptor. Briefing documents for the 1985 range describe the then unnamed toy as an "Autobot Scientist". Friedman may have been told to include this figure in his script.
*[[Blurr (G1)/Generation 1 cartoon continuity|Blurr]]- In contrast to his superspeed ,talks slow like Jimmy Stewart. Transforms into a  "LAND SPEED RECORD HOLDING ROCKET CAR." Like in the final film he doesn't do much.

===Humans===
*Colonel Blaze-A General Patton type with a streak of white hair. Later, helps Arcee and Wheeljack defend Earth from the Entity's forces.
*Rusty Steel- A "Green Beret type Colonel". Described as similar to Indiana Jones in that he makes quips but is capable when under threat. Idolized by Daniel but mostly distrusted by the boy's mother.  His personality would be applied to Springer in later drafts after being cut.
*[[Daniel Witwicky (G1)|Daniel Prentiss]]- A 12 year old who views Rusty as his idol. He's not his son (his father is mentioned at one point) he just really looks up to him.  Totally saves the day at the end. The only human to make it into the final cut, where he would become Spike's son. Gives Rusty his lucky silver dollar which is completely irrelevant to the plot.
*Ellen Prentiss- A computer scientist. Daniel's mother. Doesn't like Rusty at first but learns to trust him over the course of the film. Initially can't transform her Exo-Suit but manages at the end which means she's the one responsible for saving Earth and defeating Unicron.
===Decepticons===
*[[Galvatron (G1)/Generation 1 cartoon continuity|Galvatron]]- Still a reformatted Megatron. Described as a larger version of Megatron, coated in scales (like those that cover the planet Unicron) and wearing the Entity's insignia. His alt mode is still a self propelled laser cannon which is described as a "DEATH-SHIP MODE". Swears vengeance on the Entity for the destruction of Cybertron and his suffering at his hands. Despite this at the end when he's given a chance to destroy the Entity he completely ignores it.
*[[Sweep]] party- a group of identical, emotionless "BLACK CLAD "GESTAPO" Decepticons. Turn into "HISSING BLACK VEHICLES", which are explicitly said to be land vehicles. True to their name they perform sweeps of an area to find surviving Autobots and destroy them. This descriptive title would become their actual name in the second draft. They have heavily mechanical voices.
===The Entity===
*The Entity/ Planet [[Unicron/Generation 1|Unicron]] - Introduced as a ghostly voice the Entity, "The Absorber of Unicron" rebuilds Megatron and grants him power in servitude to him. The Decepticon leader is taken to the hellish planet of Unicron which is covered in steel trees and grass (later revealed to be hair in robot mode). The planet is coated in scales which his servants also share. Has a "COLD RAY" (columns of light) which he uses to both reward and punish his minions. Unicron grows in size the more energy is absorbed, eventually draining enough to be able to transform revealing that it and The Entity are the same being. Originally he was created by the ancient Junkions as a protector before being corrupted by power. His origin would be removed in the second draft while the twist about his true identity remained before being dropped in later drafts.
===The Quintessons===
*[[Quintessons]]- They have a similar role to the final version. What changed is their appearance. While still five-faced at this point they have slender bodies which are too small for their massive heads. They also have psychic abilities, at one point using telekinesis to create more Sharkticons from scrap. Their powers would be removed but their appearance would remain into the second draft.
*[[Sharkticons]]- Also have a similar role to later drafts with a similar appearance. They still hunt down intruders on their masters orders, but carry cattle prod like shock sticks that freeze intruders in time. Their growls are revealed to be them constantly repeating "we eat". They are covered in primitive sensors that they use to identify other Sharkticons by bumping into them. Hot Rod and Tanker are able to get them to devour each other by coating these sensors in grease. No other Quintesson servants appear at this stage.
===Junkions===
*[[Junkions]]- A tribe of robot Road Warrior Hell's Angels made of rusty and disused metal. Long ago they created The Entity as their protector before it became corrupted. Generations later they live hidden from it in the Veil of Fog. They don't talk TV yet. Still able to reassemble themselves after being torn apart.
*[[Wreck-Gar (G1)|Wreck-Gar]]- The Junkion leader, wears a Nazi helmet. Turns into a motorcycle.
*Scrapo- A massive Junkion that befriends the Dinobots. Fascinated with "shebots" (we don't know the full context, this follows from a scene which starts on a missing script page). Grimlock tells him Wheeljack will build a "Dino Girl" for him. Stage descriptions mention he fed metal to Grimlock on one of the missing pages. The role of Dinobots pal would later be given to Wheelie.

==What Changed==
Unsurprisingly for a first draft many plot points would change in later revisions. Major story changes include:
*The script takes place in the present day. The move to the future that would be mandated by Hasbro.
*Various scenes of characters running from place to place were streamlined. For example in a 20 page sequence, Hot Rod is sent from the makeshift base to find reinforcements in the desert, runs into the Dinobots, then goes to the refinery and heads to an Artic base. In the second draft everyone is just at Autobot City.  
*The script opens on Earth, not Cybertron or its moons.
*No Autobot City yet, just the steel mill and the later attack on Headquarters.  
*All the human characters except for Daniel were cut.
*Optimus is the only named character from the show to die. Everyone else seemingly survives.
*The Matrix is present as a radically different and even more nebulous plot device than in the final film. In the film the Matrix at least has a clear purpose: it's the Autobot symbol of leadership and a great weapon the Chosen One will wield against the ultimate evil. Here it's basically Optimus' soul, a tiny glowing version of himself which seven pages from the end is revealed to be able to destroy Unicron. Stage directions refer to it as "the Matrix of Optimus Prime."  In this version Hot Rod never really fulfills his character arc and the Autobots don't get a new leader after Magnus dies. In the final version Galvatron wants the Matrix to destroy Unicron; here he wants it because he senses Optimus' essence in it (later on he instead tries to kill Unicron with a bomb.)
**The Matrix would be introduced in [[The New Order|issue 5]] of the Marvel comics. It bears no resemblance to the one seen here. We don't know if this was an attempt of creative synergy by Hasbro or if the name was just a massive coincidence.
**In the second draft the Matrix and Megatron's essence both become [[Life Spark|Life Sparks]]. At some point the Matrix is added back in.
*Cybertron is destroyed by Unicron, with 160 pages left. He spends the rest of the script trying to destroy Earth. From the second draft onwards he attempts to destroy Cybertron in the climax.
*The energy cage would be dropped. In the final film Unicron doesn't need to absorb energy.
*The fight on the asteroid would be cut, leaving just the ambush on the shuttles.
*The remaining Autobots on Earth try to launch a counter attack on the Decepticons. This remains into the second draft in a massively reduced role before being cut in the final film.
*Galvatron kills Magnus, Mentlar and Blurr. They stay dead. No being rebuilt by the Junkions.
*Unicron's origin was dropped as is his connection to the Junkions.
*Daniel is the one that uses the Matrix to save the day.
Other differences:
*Characters like [[Cyclonus (G1)/Generation 1 cartoon continuity|Cyclonus]], [[Scourge (G1)|Scourge]] and [[Wheelie (G1)|Wheelie]] don't exist yet.
*Magnus only becomes Ultra Magnus when he gains the Matrix.  
*Hot Rod never becomes Rodimus Prime. It's possible Hasbro hadn't come up with that aspect of the character yet.
*[[Spike Witwicky (G1)/Generation 1 cartoon continuity|Spike]] doesn't appear in this or the second draft at all.
*The Dinobots only have three members: [[Grimlock (G1)/Generation 1 cartoon continuity|Grimlock]], [[Sludge (G1)|Sludge]] and [[Swoop (G1)|Swoop]].
*[[Kranix|Granix]] has a much smaller role. [[Lithone]] is only mentioned as his homeworld (and is a planet of rock robots rather than regular robots), instead he was captured by the Quintessons during a scientific expedition.  
==What Stayed The Same==
*Megatron and Optimus' final fight is nearly identical to the final film even down to having some of the same dialogue. Considering that killing Optimus was the one thing we know Hasbro wanted, this may not be that surprising.
*Despite the rest of the script being massively reworked the Quintesson scenes are similar to the final film even if there are various differences:
**The planet's appearance would go unchanged in later drafts, still having a Mercury sea with red desert shores and metallic reefs which are home to robot fish.
**The Robot Squid fight still occurs and is dealt with similarly (Albeit with Hot Rod using his "magnet power" to collect Tanker's parts.)
**Tanker and Hot Rod encounter the Sharkticons on a ridge with metallic vegetation. To communicate with them they use the "universal alien language salutation." Despite the name this is the exact same thing as the universal greeting. Like in the film it only briefly works.
**The captured Hot Rod and Tanker are taken to a compound where fellow prisoner Granix tells them about the Quintessons and their show trials.
**The Quintesson trials are still a sham, but rather than the guilty or innocent verdict they are "found innocent of trespassing, but guilty of insolence."
**The arrival of the Dinobots saves the pair from being devoured by the Sharkticons.

==This Script was Written in 1984==
Some of the oddness of this script comes from it being written early in Transformers' existence. With only the first season to draw on many aspects of the Transformers mythos we know today didn't exist yet.
*Being massively outnumbered by the Autobots the script features many generic Decepticons to pad out their ranks.
*The only 1985 characters to appear are [[Thrust (G1)|Thrust]], [[Dirge (G1)|Dirge]] and [[Ramjet (G1)|Ramjet]].  
*The lackluster opening attack on the steel mill makes more sense when you consider most season 1 episodes opened with the Decepticons raiding power plants, factories or construction sites. Years later Freidman called this opening "too ordinary" and was glad he came up with something more memorable.  <ref>I Killed Optimus Prime, Ron Friedman page 171 </ref>     
*Hasbro almost certainly hadn't determined the movie characters' designs at this point, hence why Friedman has to suggest what they turn into at various points.  
*Autobot headquarters is called Crater Mountain, a name used in scripts for the first season that didn't make it into the final show.
*[[Scrapper (G1)|Scrapper]] is still called by his preliminary name [[Gravedigger]].

==Things We Haven't Mentioned Yet==
*Flint Dille's copy of the script was incomplete. Three pages were missing. Two of them (page 200 and 203) were mentioned in the summary. The other was page 137 where the Autobot shuttle crashes on the Entity's moon and then we cut back to the Autobots on Earth.
*This script features a lot of details that couldn't fit in the summary.
*In the opening battle the Decepticon uses Fire Snow, a "snow crystal" cloud" which rains down flakes of fire which continuously burn the Autobot soldiers. That sounds worryingly like napalm.
*A Decepticon soldier tries to kill Hot Rod with a Laser Chainsaw only to end up cutting himself in half (length-ways) after Tanker trips him over.
*Hot Rod has a laser gun which runs out of ammo.... somehow.
*Like in the finished film, Hot Rod blames himself for Prime's death. Unlike in the film the other Autobots comfort him and assure him it wasn't his fault.
*Wheeljack has a prominent supporting role in this script. Unfortunately it involves him being a massive misogynist for laughs. This include:
**When Arcee chooses to join Wheeljack's team because she's "the best metal worker you've got". To this he tells her to "keep out of the way."
**When the Autobots are constructing the shuttle Arcee saves him from falling machinery. Of course he doesn't notice this since he was on a call with Magnus.
**When the Decepticons attack the mill Wheeljack misses her fighting Bonecrusher and derides her for ruining his report.
**Before launching the shuttle Arcee corrects him about how some of the thrusters should be positioned. He agrees with this but when he realise Arcee told him it he tells her "do you mind".
**After she defeats Starscream he congratulates her for finally pulling her weight. Understandably this annoys her.
**When Decepticons leave Earth and they realise they now have a chance to take back the planet she kisses him. Which he begrudgingly accepts but says isn't appropriate for comrades in arms. AUUGH
**As Unicron appears over the Earth Wheeljack finally apologizes saying he "didn't mean half the things I said".
** Look, let's be blunt, Wheeljack's misogyny is terrible and makes no sense. Even more so when you consider Friedman created Arcee because his daughter liked sci-fi. <ref> "[https://toddmatthy.com/2013/12/31/he-killed-optimus-prime-an-interview-with-ron-friedman-writer-of-transformers-the-movie/ He Killed Optimus Prime: An Interview With Ron Friedman the Writer of Transformers:The Movie]</ref> 
*The Hall of Heroes has a larger role in this draft. Described as a high tech art-deco " Nuremberg Party Rally" where the essence of dying leaders are placed in urns that flow into statues of the Decepticon 'Hero's' chest. This detail would carry over into the second draft.
*Of the former leaders named in the Hall of Heroes only [[Ghoulon]] would make it into the film. Cryotron and Octacron would never be seen again.
*Autobot headquarters has been expanded into a high tech rotating "medieval fortified city-state". Various human civilians, scientists and soldiers live there.
*Similar to Prime's Matrix, Megatron's essence is a tiny glasslike version of himself.  
*An Autobot is mentioned that turns into an electric tug. (The kind that pulls aircraft, not the boat as amazing as that would have been)
*The Decepticons converted by the Entity gain giant scale covered forms, though are said to still be recognizable as their former selves. They also get a new insignia. Apparently their powers are now "beyond computation". They have a rallying cry of yelling "Entity!" as they charge into battle.
*Cybertron was located in Space Quadrant Zeta.
*This isn't really an error but the Autobots never learn that Megatron has been renamed Galvatron.
*Among the Entity's attacking forces are "DECEPTICONS like Starscream and Skywarp".
*A salvaged Teletraan 1 is rebuilt into a mobile tank like vehicle.
*When the "Sweeps" attack the makeshift base, Magnus diversion has Sideswipe and Sunstreaker fight them off with steel beams they use like baseball bats.
*Snarl and Slug are missing from the Dinobots. At least one of them made it into the final film.
*Bumblebee might be killed off. When the shuttle is attacked he is blown off scene in an explosion. He isn't mentioned again leaving his fate unclear.
*To plot a course for the ship Mentlar has to plug himself into the computer entering a trance-like state as he does.
*Hot Rod creates "a glass "Bubble" head-piece" to breath underwater. Notice something off about that sentence?
*Apparently Hot Rod can also turn into "a modified underwater- ready mode".
*Granix is able to kill several Sharkticons in gladiatorial combat before he's killed.
*The Quintessons have various other prisoners besides Granix awaiting trial, who help the Autobots escape after their freed.
*Unlike in the film the Quintessons don't have a ship. As a result the Autobots just fly through space on their own.
*When Magnus leads the troops in their last stand Springer bids farewell with "Until all matrixes are one". This would become [['til all are one]] in later drafts.
*Tanker mentions someone called Ectalon.
*Various generic Junkions are featured. One tricycle Junkion which attacks Ellen is described as having a viking helmet and a metal like woolen jacket. This design would be copied word for word and given to Wreck-Gar in the second draft.  
*The humans get chained to a  Flatbed "jail Truck" when captured by the Junkions.
*On route to Unicron, the Autobots encounter the wounded remnants of the Decepticon armada heading back to Earth. They hide from them in an asteroid field.
*The Junkions live in a village which is described as being a "JUNKY, HIGH TECH AFRICAN KRAAL -TRAILER PARK- CYCLE BUM PAD" It's described as having various strange Junkion creatures, and decorated with machinery and shrunken heads.
*The Junkion computer is print out. Well they do call it primitive...
*A desperate Galvatron is able to blast off one of The Entity's fingers. It then immediately grows back.  
*The Decepticons flee as the Entity is destroyed. That's more of an explanation than we get in the final film.
*At the very end the Autobots build a new base. It isn't described in any way.

==General weirdness==
It is likely many of the following would have been addressed in future revisions had this draft been approved. Nevertheless:
*At various points in the script Friedman suddenly suggests that a generic Transformer in the scene is a specific character with "say (name)". He seemed to do this whenever the role was too important for a generic. For example, midway through Springer's fight with the Decepticon jets it is revealed they are led by Starscream when he orders them to destroy the Autobot. It seems he didn't think about which characters were going to appear until he had to.  
*It seems Friedman couldn't make up his mind if Transformers could fly in space or not. Sometimes they need a ship, but other times they don’t. Hasbro must have also found this confusing and in the second outline made it clear they need a spaceship to do this.
*[[Shockwave (G1)/Generation 1 cartoon continuity|Shockwave]] is mentioned exactly once as being in the crowd of Decepticons when Galvatron appears at the Hall of Heroes.
*No one seems bothered by the destruction of Cybertron. Like after they find out the planet is gone they never mention it again. Galvatron’s vow of revenge is never mentioned again (not even when he tries to blow up Unicron) and he is given other reasons to hate The Entity.
*The Autobots spend pages building the Recontour shield which is described in great detail. It gets destroyed almost instantly.  
*All the space cruisers are mentioned to be destroyed in the attack on the mill. But later they just offhandedly reveal Arcee and Wheeljack saved one.
*We mentioned this before but Chemico clearly only exists to create a distraction to allow the Autobots to escape. Did Friedman just make this script up as he went along?
*Mentlar's weapon is briefly able to depower the Entity's troops. However, almost immediately they develop immunity to it and it's never mentioned again.
*Daniel gives Rusty his father’s silver dollar for luck when the Autobots launch their cruiser. It comes up later when Rusty tries to assure him that everything will be okay when Magnus leads his final attack on the Decepticons. That's it, it never comes up again, that plot point goes nowhere.
*When saving Tanker from the Squid, Hot Rod is revealed to have Magnetic powers. These are never mentioned again.
*Grimlock is able to evade capture by the Sharkticons, find the Quintesson compound and free the captured Dinobots. Unlike in the final film all of this happens off screen.
*It sure seems like a lot must have happened on the missing page where they befriended the Junkions. In the second draft this sequence is expanded by 3 pages.
*With no foreshadowing or build up, an aura tells Hot Rod that the Matrix can destroy The Entity.

==Remnants==
Despite the massive reworking done in later drafts, this version still provides explanations for some things left unexplained in the final movie.
*How does Hot Rod find his friends? Rather than just running into them due to luck, the Quintessons tell him where to find them.  
*As the Junkions created Unicron they know how he works and what his weak points are. This is why they agree to help fight him.
*Unicron doesn’t just transform at the end for dramatic effect, at this point he's finally absorbed enough energy to be able to transform himself.
*Why does Magnus have such a minor role after being rebuilt by the Junkions? He was originally meant to stay dead.

==Concept Art==
Despite the script being rejected several pieces of concept art were created from it. All three known pieces were drawn by [[Floro Dery]] and according to the design notes were done at the same time.

<center><gallery>
File:FloroDeryUnicronNotes.jpg|Note the 'Moon of the Entity' and the 'hole to the center of the Entity', two features which only exist in this draft.
File:FloroDeryJunkionnotes.jpg|The unnamed Junkion who's design would be used for Wreck-Gar. Note the lack of Nazi helmet.
File:FloroDerySharkticonNotes.jpg|Sharkticon concept art which gives them the alternate name of Sharkons which isn't used in the script
</gallery></center>
==References==
{{Reflist}}
==External Links==

*[https://drive.google.com/file/d/1qiESvs6xDIfpNh3zVegyt7HuCIJLKqOD/view The script itself]

*[https://sunbowmarvelarchive.blogspot.com/2022/11/detailed-outline-of-very-first.html  A detailed summary on the Sunbow Marvel Archive]

[[Category:Unproduced scripts]]