The Next Best Thing to Being There!

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When there's no more room in hell, the Constructicons will walk the Earth.
"The Next Best Thing to Being There!"
Publisher	Marvel Comics
First published	July 1985
Cover date	November 1985
Writer	Bob Budiansky
Penciler	Ricardo Villamonte
Inker	Brad Joyce
Colorist	Nel Yomtov
Letterer	Janice Chiang
Editor	Mike Carlin
Continuity	Marvel Comics continuity

The Autobots must stop the Decepticons from sending a message to Cybertron. But the Decepticons have a rather large surprise for them...

Synopsis

Shockwave succeeds in creating the first of his new generation of Decepticons—the Constructicons. They immediately depart with Soundwave on their first mission, to build a transdimensional radio wave scrambler with which to contact their home planet of Cybertron.

Prowl gives G.B. Blackrock a tour of the Ark. Along the way, they encounter the homesick Huffer, who's been focused on repairing the interstellar comm system instead of his primary assignment. Blackrock offers the Autobots a way to spy on the Decepticons within Blackrock's aerospace plant using a bugged telephone system. Using this system, they learn of the Constructicons' mission, and send a team to intercept them.

Elsewhere, Sparkplug Witwicky returns home from his heart attack, and is surprised to find that Buster has actually cleared out the repair shop's entire backlog of automobiles. Buster wonders how to explain to his father his recent experience with Optimus Prime, and the subsequent powers he's gained.

Near the site of the Constructicon project, trucker Bomber Bill looks forward to a return home after a long assignment, but his truck is stolen by the Constructicons as raw material for the scrambler. Determined to get home, Bomber Bill attempts to follow the thieves, and meets the Autobots on the way. Huffer offers a lift to the human.

The Autobots attack the Constructicons, who reveal their ability to combine into the super-robot, Devastator. The others distract the slow-witted giant, but Huffer hesitates to destroy the scrambler, which he sees as a rare chance to contact home. The delay is enough time for Soundwave to charge the scrambler and begin sending his signal to Cybertron; Bomber Bill destroys the scrambler, but most of Soundwave's message goes through. Their mission accomplished, the Decepticons retreat. Huffer thanks Bomber Bill for his help, but laments that while the trucker can go home now, he can't.

At the aerospace plant, Shockwave discovers that Optimus Prime may no longer possess the Creation Matrix. If this proves true, Shockwave no longer has any reason to allow Prime to live. The Autobots, listening in from the Ark, are helpless.

Featured characters

(Numbers indicate order of appearance.)

Autobots	Decepticons	Humans
Optimus Prime (1) Prowl (11) Bluestreak (12) Brawn (13) Ratchet (14) Jazz (15) Sunstreaker (16) Huffer (17) Bumblebee (18) Hound (24) Ironhide (25)	Shockwave (2) Scavenger (4) Mixmaster (5) Long Haul (6) Bonecrusher (7) Scrapper (8) Hook (9) Laserbeak (19) Soundwave (26) Devastator (27)	Ferdy and Gabe (3) G.B. Blackrock (10) Sparkplug Witwicky (20) Buster Witwicky (21) Bomber Bill (22) Ethel (23)

Errors

• On page 4, the text says Scavenger transforms into a "truck crane". The art is also strange. Either Scavenger passes through a Hook-like form before becoming his usual shovel or there is another shovel Constructicon sitting next to him.
• On page 13, Ironhide is colored like Ratchet, and on page 18, he's colored like Devastator.
• On page 20, Soundwave's head is totally wrong.
• During the battle with Devastator, Bluestreak is colored like Bumblebee.
• When Shockwave created the Constructicons, he made their brain modules first and only created their bodies this issue. Why does he create Jetfire's body first, before knowing that he'll be able to put life into it?

Items of note

• First Appearances: Scrapper, Hook, Scavenger, Mixmaster, Long Haul, Bonecrusher, Devastator.
• Jetfire is introduced here, although only as an unfinished, lifeless shell.
• This is the last issue in which Prime's severed head is drawn with its antennae detached, with tubes and wires connecting them to the head. In the next two issues, it is drawn with the standard "wires holding the head" shown in issues #5 and #6.
• Page orders were changed for the UK printing to provide a more effective "cliffhanger" ending for issue #35. US page 11 was printed before pages 9 and 10. A caption was also removed from the last panel of page 10. The upshot of this change was that Bomber Bill was introduced 2 pages earlier in the UK version of this issue than in the US.
• Issue #36 of the UK comic included "Robot War II", the second in an irregular series of text features summarising events seen in the comic so far.

References

• Sunstreaker is noted as being badly damaged, likely as a reference to issue #5, when Shockwave destroyed his body as an example to the detained Megatron.

Covers (3)

• 
  US issue #10 - Devastator was momentarily distracted by the tiny dancing Bluestreak on his fist
• UK issue #35 - Muahahahaha!!!
  UK issue #35 - Muahahahaha!!!
• UK issue #36 - Ramp up the lime green, folks!
  UK issue #36 - Ramp up the lime green, folks!

• US cover: Devastator smacking down the Autobots, by Kyle Baker.
• UK issue #35 cover: Shockwave creates a Constructicon brain, by John Ridgway.
• UK issue #36 cover: reuse of art from US cover.

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