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{{suite|root=Letters page}}
{{suite|root=Letters page}}
[[File:HeavyTraffic Film2006.jpg|upright=1.4|thumb|Only British fans will understand the logo on this page!]]
[[File:Grimlock letter.jpg|upright=1.4|thumb|Send a letter to Grimlock, and Grimlock sends a letter to you!]]


The [[Marvel Comics|Marvel UK]] [[The Transformers (franchise)|Generation 1]] [[The Transformers (Marvel comic)|comic]] had an interesting approach to [[letters page|fan mail]] — the letters were answered by [[Transformer]]s.
The [[Marvel Comics|Marvel UK]] [[The Transformers (Marvel comic)|Generation 1 comic]] had an interesting approach to [[letters page|fan mail]] — the letters were answered by [[Transformer]]s!


Originally the Marvel UK comics' letters pages were a fairly pedestrian affair (let it be said, however, that many fans considered the '80s series itself superior to the American--being somewhat more mature and austere), occasionally spiced up by a [[Hasbro]] employee dropping in [[To sell toys|to plug toys]]. However, starting with issue [[The New Order|#22]], a new take was created with a Transformer answering the letters page in character.  By this stage the comic was being printed in a weekly format which, combined with in-character letter answerers, resulted in a very informal, "chatty" interaction with fans. [[Simon Furman]] attributes this to [[Ian Rimmer]] being trained at IPC, where an editorial 'character' who would answer letters was part of the product; on ''Scream!'', for example, where both men had worked, the comic was 'edited' and readers spoken to by Ghastly McNasty<ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2vpunNgHR4M The Great Derelict] 13:05 in</ref> who claimed to live and work in IPC's dungeon basement.   
Originally the Marvel UK comic's letters pages were a fairly pedestrian affair, occasionally spiced up by a [[Hasbro]] employee dropping in [[To sell toys|to plug toys]]. However, starting with issue [[The New Order|22]], a new take was created with a Transformer answering the letters page in character.  By this stage the comic was being printed in a weekly format which, combined with in-character letter answerers, resulted in a very informal, "chatty" interaction with fans. [[Simon Furman]] attributes this to [[Ian Rimmer]] being trained at {{w|TI Media|IPC Magazines Ltd.}}, where an editorial 'character' who would answer letters was part of the product; on ''{{w|Scream! (comics)|Scream!}}'', for example, where both men had worked, the comic was 'edited' and readers spoken to by Ghastly McNasty<ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2vpunNgHR4M The Great Derelict] 13:05 in</ref> who claimed to live and work in IPC's dungeon basement.   


While Ian Rimmer came up with the concept, Simon Furman would write the bulk of them and was the man who argued [[Soundwave (G1)/Marvel Comics continuity|Soundwave]], rather than an Autobot, should be the host.<ref>[[The Transformers Classics UK Volume 1]], page 14</ref>
While Ian Rimmer came up with the concept, Simon Furman would write the bulk of them and was the man who argued [[Soundwave (G1)/Marvel Comics continuity|Soundwave]], rather than an Autobot, should be the host.<ref>[[The Transformers Classics UK Volume 1]], page 14</ref>


The letters pages created on-going in-jokes, addressed continuity errors and were constantly telling the readers (especially during [[Grimlock (G1)/Marvel Comics continuity|Grimlock]]'s tenure) to ignore the [[The Transformers (cartoon)|cartoon]] because, while it was an amusing diversion, the '''comics''' were the real story. This is the only time any Transformers fiction has claimed it was more legitimate than another fiction. Generally TF fictions just ignore each other.
The letters pages created on-going in-jokes, addressed continuity errors and were constantly telling the readers (especially during [[Grimlock (G1)/Marvel Comics continuity|Grimlock]]'s tenure) to ignore the [[The Transformers (cartoon)|cartoon]] because, while it was an amusing diversion, the '''comics''' were the real story. It's not every day that a ''Transformers'' fiction makes the claim of being more legitimate than another!


There were tips about where to pick up old merchandise, and sightings of new toys. The corner section of the page ran recurring items as well — "Stock Exchange" and "Comic Exchange" let fans swap their toys and comics with each other; other times, a fan might have a list of their favourite aspects of the series (issue, character, artist, etc.) printed.
There were tips about where to pick up old merchandise, and sightings of new toys. The corner section of the page ran recurring items as well — "Stock Exchange" and "Comic Exchange" let fans swap their toys and comics with each other; other times, a fan might have a "Your Choice" printed – a list of their favourite aspects of the series, be they issue, character, artist and so on.


The letter answerers were also unashamedly biased towards their own factions and generally completely biased towards themselves. They'd often berate or tease letter writers, talk down about the previous columnists or berate the writers of the series itself.
The letter answerers were also unashamedly biased towards their own factions and generally completely biased towards themselves. They'd often berate or tease letter writers, talk down about the previous columnists or berate the staff of the series itself (in all good fun office banter, out of universe).


Those lucky fans who had a letter printed would receive a free [[Mini Vehicle|mini-Autobot]] or [[Special Teams]] toy, as well as a [[:File:Grimlock letter.jpg|reply]] from the Transformer in question.
Those lucky fans who had a letter printed would receive a free [[Mini Vehicle|mini-Autobot]] or, later, a [[Special Teams]] toy, as well as a reply from the Transformer in question.


==Outside-inside continuity==
==Outside-inside continuity==
The ''continuity'' of the letters page is somewhat complicated.  Generally the writers treated themselves as 'in continuity', even if this defied all logic. While the comic had a human production staff ([[Stubbie]]s) who could be blamed for some gaffes that might occur, the comic was also supposed to portray "real events".  Or, as Grimlock put it when a fan tried to blame the writer for [[Galvatron (G1)|Galvatron's]] rampage:
The ''continuity'' of the letters page is somewhat complicated.  Generally the answerers treated themselves as 'in continuity', even if this defied all logic. While the comic had a human production staff ([[Stubbie]]s) who could be blamed for some gaffes that might occur, the comic was also supposed to portray "real events".  Or, as Grimlock put it when a fan tried to blame the writer for [[Galvatron (G1)|Galvatron's]] rampage:


:''The story that appears in this comic is an accurate representation of the actual events as they happened. So, just this once, you can't really blame the Stubbies involved. That said in issue [[Fallen Angel|#102]] they got it all wrong. Fancy showing Galvatron actually defeating me in battle!''  '''Ridiculous!''' -''Grimlock, [http://www.transfans.co.uk/comics_guide_detail.php?id=136&amp;page=7 answering letter]''
{{quote|The story that appears in this comic is an accurate representation of the actual events as they happened. So, just this once, you can't really blame the Stubbies involved. That said, in issue 102 they got it all wrong. Fancy showing Galvatron actually defeating me in battle! ''Ridiculous!''|<ref>[[Source:Grim Grams#Issue 124|Grim Grams, issue 124]]</ref>}}


The hosts answered questions and bantered with fans, discussing subjects ranging from [[Megatron (G1)/Marvel Comics continuity|Megatron's]] Cybertronian form (a hand-held laser gun) to [[Optimus Prime (G1)/Marvel Comics continuity|Optimus Prime's]] opinion of Mötley Crüe's music (he hates it). In some cases the letters page is the only canon source for vital information about characters. For example, [[Chuffer]]'s name comes completely from the letters pages.
The hosts answered questions and bantered with fans, discussing subjects ranging from [[Megatron (G1)/Marvel Comics continuity|Megatron's]] Cybertronian form (a handheld laser gun)<ref>[[Source:Grim Grams#Issue 75|Grim Grams, issue 75]]</ref> to [[Optimus Prime (G1)/Marvel Comics continuity|Optimus Prime's]] opinion of Mötley Crüe's music (not a fan!).<ref>[[Source:Darn 'n' Blast#Issue 324|Darn 'n' Blast, issue 324]]</ref> In some cases the letters page is the only canon source for vital information about characters. For example, [[Chuffer]]'s name comes completely from the letters pages.


The waters of canon were further muddied by the letters pages' interaction with [[Robo-Capers]]. Transitions of the letter answerers were generally shown in a Robo-Capers strip, (or in one case, a text story — which also served as that year's [[Christmas]] story). These strips illustrated the exact details of how the letters column would change hands. Occasionally other Robo-Capers strips would also show behind-the-scenes goings-on at Marvel or scenes to do with the letter answerer, like Grimlock going to see the [[The Transformers: The Movie|TF movie]].
The waters of canon were further muddied by the letters pages' interaction with editorial columns and the gag strip, ''[[Robo-Capers]]'', which would generally treat the letter answerer as being an employee of Marvel UK, operating out of their offices and interacting with the staff. In an early strip, Soundwave would [[Robo-Capers issue 59|blow up a Marvel office]] after one printing mistake too many, and later on, Grimlock would [[Robo-Capers issue 91|let the fame of being a movie star go to his head]]. It became something or a tradition for the transition of letter answerers to be depicted in special ''Robo-Capers'' strips, though in one case a departure was told in a special [[Christmas|festive]] text story in the editorial slot, and in another, the host was inaugurated by an appearance in ''Robo-Capers''{{'}} replacement, ''[[Combat Colin]]''.


How this all fits together with the actual comics canon is anyone's guess. Especially since Marvel Comics appears in-story, through [[Donny Finkleberg]]. Even more horrifying is this thought: If the letters pages are canon, that makes every single human who wrote into the pages a canon part of TF fiction. Let's... ahhh... let's not start publishing pages about them, though, please.
How this all fits together with the actual comics canon is anyone's guess. The writers merely dramatise the real events, which happen to their Transformer co-workers, who also appear in fourth-wall breaking gag strips published by the same company depicting their career at that company, which ''also'' exists in-universe, via comics writer [[Donny Finkleberg]]. Even more horrifying is this thought: If the letters pages are canon, that makes every single human who wrote into the pages a canon part of ''Transformers'' fiction. Let's... ahhh... let's not start publishing pages about them, though, please. (All right, we'll make [[James Roberts|''one'' exception]].)


==Hosts/Page title==
==Hosts/Page title==
[[File:35LETTERScomp.JPEG|left|upright=0.8|thumb|Soundwave superior, fanboys inferior.]]
===Soundwaves===
{{anchor|Soundwaves}}
[[File:35LETTERScomp.JPEG|upright=0.8|thumb|Soundwave superior, fanboys inferior.]]
*[[Soundwave (G1)/Marvel Comics continuity|Soundwave]] hosted the page under the title '''Soundwaves''', from issue [[The New Order|#22]] to issue [[Showdown!|#73]]. It was revealed in [[Prime Time!|#40]] that he had gotten the spot through blackmail. Whenever [[Autobot]]s (puttup) were named in the letters page, for example Optimus Prime (puttup), Soundwave would spit. What exactly the (puttup) meant was kind of confusing until issue [[Second Generation!|#65]] when Soundwave actually spat (puttup and all... through his face plate, no less) at Robot Master in the main strip. This strange scene further linked the letters page to general canon.
"Soundwaves" was hosted by... well, [[Soundwave (G1)/Marvel Comics continuity|Soundwave]], beginning in [[The New Order|issue 22]]. Bringing an acidic tone to the letters page, Soundwave would openly compliment his readers' duplicity and encourage them to become loyal Decepticon supporters. He apparently got the job by blackmailing the editor.<ref>[[Source:Soundwaves#Issue 40|Soundwaves, issue 40]]</ref> He took his leave in issue 73 to devote his full attention to crushing the Autobots, having caught wind of a potential [[Dinobot (G1)|Dinobot]] coup to take the page by force.<ref>[[Source:Soundwaves#Issue 73|Soundwaves, issue 73]]</ref> The changeover of hosts was depicted in a [[Robo-Capers issue 74|special ''Robo-Capers'' strip in issue 74]].
 
Soundwave referred to his readers as "Carbon-Based Units", and the staff at Marvel UK as his "human helpers (ha!)", who he would neuro-shock when they failed him. His main idiosyncrasy was his addition of "puttup!" after names he found distasteful, like Autobot (puttup!) or Optimus Prime (puttup!). The meaning of "puttup" was something of a mystery,<ref>[[Source:Soundwaves#Issue 34|Transformation, issue 34]]</ref> with it eventually being revealed as a spit of disgust when Soundwave took aim at [[Donny Finkleberg|Robot Master]] in the main comic strip {{storylink|Second Generation!}} – yes, through his faceplate!
 
The Soundwaves era ran for a period of 53 issues, or about one year and three weeks in real time. 46 Soundwaves features were printed all together, though you could call it 47 depending on if you count the following, guest columnist...
{{-}}
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{{anchor|Rat-Chat}}
===Rat-Chat===
[[File:41LETTERScomp.JPEG|Right|upright=0.8|thumb|Oh, NOW I get it! Ha ha that's not funny.]]
[[File:41LETTERScomp.JPEG|upright=0.8|thumb|Oh, NOW I get it! Ha ha that's not funny.]]
*[[Ratchet (G1)/Marvel Comics continuity|Ratchet]] hosted '''Rat-Chat''' for issue [[Christmas Breaker!|#41]] only. Ratchet generally crowed about having taken over the letters page — but his responses were a bit weak compared to the acidic tone of Soundwave.
Christmas 1985, and the Marvel staffers found their office party had plenty of cassettes but no player – and, in order to make Soundwave amenable, they kept him sufficiently lubricated with high grade oil. Too much oil.  Soundwave proved too hungover to answer letters the following day, so the staff picked [[Ratchet (G1)/Marvel Comics continuity|Ratchet]] as a fill-in, bringing us "Rat-Chat" in [[Christmas Breaker!|issue 41]].<ref>[[Source:Soundwaves#Issue 41|Transformation/Rat-Chat, issue 41]]</ref>
 
Ratch specifically chose to print letters featuring anti-Decepticon sentiments, complimenting the senders on any insults slung at Soundwave. Alas, he was a bit too nice, and therefore bland, for a letters host, and so Rat-Chat only appeared this once (perhaps due to intervention from Soundwave<ref>[[Source:Soundwaves#Issue 51|Soundwaves, issue 51]]</ref>).
{{-}}
{{-}}


{{anchor|Grim Grams}}
===Grim Grams===
[[File:78LETTERScomp.JPEG|left|upright=0.8|thumb|That's one helluva letter opener.]]
[[File:78LETTERScomp.JPEG|upright=0.8|thumb|That's one helluva letter opener.]]
[[File:Grimlock letter.jpg|upright=0.8|thumb]]
[[Grimlock (G1)/Marvel Comics continuity|Grimlock]] began hosting "Grim Grams" after storming the building, {{storylink|Robo-Capers issue 74}} though he was probably forced to thanks to being underneath an avalanche of Soundwave's unopened mail.<ref>[[Source:Grim Grams#Issue 74|Inside back cover, issue 74]]</ref> Grim Grams began in [[In the National Interest|issue 75]], featuring an original header of Big Grim by [[Will Simpson]]. It fit awkwardly in a three-column format but it's such a nice picture who'd want to change it?<ref>''[[The Transformers Classics UK]]'' page 9</ref>
*[[Grimlock (G1)/Marvel Comics continuity|Grimlock]] began hosting '''Grim Grams''' after storming the building. {{storylink|Robo-Capers issue 74|Robo-Capers UK 74}} He reigned from issue [[In the National Interest|#75]] to issue [[Space Pirates!|#182]] (there was no letters page in issue #74). As the comic was doing well, they could afford to create an original picture of Big Grim for the page by [[Will Simpson]]. It fit awkwardly in a three-column format but it's such a nice picture who'd want to change it?<ref>''[[The Transformers Classics UK]]'' page 9</ref>


Grimlock was one of the most enjoyable of the hosts. He was open, genuine and fun. Also, his pages were filled with hundreds of little tidbits about Transformers canon, from the names and alt modes of otherwise unnamed generic Transformers to the fact that Galvatron has a weakness for [[chocolate covered oil drum]]s. Yikes.
As a host, Grimlock was open, personable, and genuine, and he addressed his readers as "kid". He was also very knowledgable about the Transformers, providing hundreds of little titbits of information, from the names and alternate modes of otherwise unnamed generic characters to [[Galvatron (G1)|Galvatron]]'s secret weakness: [[chocolate covered oil drum]]s.<ref>[[Source:Grim Grams#Issue 110|Grim Grams, issue 110]]</ref> (Well, all right – he might have told some tall tales, but at least he was convincing.<ref>[[Source:Grim Grams#Issue 164|Grim Grams, issue 164]]</ref>)


Grimlock was particularly bloodthirsty towards the people supposedly creating the comics, starting a bunch of running gags — from referring to them as "Stubbies" to threatening to put them into the [[Variable voltage harness|VVH]]. He also got to do a few other special features, including getting to do his own review on the Transformers film. Again, stretching continuity credibility to new levels of thinness.
Grimlock introduced two key bits of vocab to the lexicon: he referred to the fallible Marvel staffers as [[Stubbie]]s (usually ''dumb'' stubbies), and was particularly bloodthirsty towards them, subjecting them to the [[variable voltage harness]] – threats of warming up the VVH for the Stubbies would appear on the letters page for years to come. His influence on the comic extended beyond the letters page, including being allowed to pen a ''completely unbiased'' review of ''[[The Transformers: The Movie]]''.<ref>[[Source:Grim Grams#Issue 91|''Film 2006, With Grimlock'', issue 91]]</ref>


Unlike Dreadwind, Grimlock never got to occupy the corner box on the cover of the comic during his massive run. At first it alternated between Optimus Prime and Megatron, then after they died between Galvatron and Rodimus Prime, and finally it went back to Powermaster Optimus Prime. Poor Grimmy.
Grimlock Grimmed his last Gram in [[Space Pirates!|issue 182]], citing his frustrations with running the page from his temporary residence of the [[Moon (moon)|Moon]]. {{storylink|Totaled!|Totalled!}}<ref>[[Source:Grim Grams#Issue 182|Grim Grams, issue 182]]</ref> His brief stopover on Earth to hand the page over to its new host was depicted in [[The Wind of Change!|another special ''Robo Capers'' in issue 183]]. The Grim Grams era ran for a period of 109 issues, or two years and four weeks in real time. 103 Grim Grams features were printed in total.
{{-}}
{{-}}


[[File:185LETTERScomp.JPEG|left|upright=0.8|thumb]]
===Dread Tidings===
[[File:213LETTERScomp.JPEG|upright=0.8|thumb]]
{{multiple image|image1=185LETTERScomp.JPEG|width1=150
{{anchor|Dread Tidings}}
|image2=213LETTERScomp.JPEG|width2=150}}
*[[Dreadwind (G1)|Dreadwind]] hosted '''Dread Tidings''' (not "Dread Fidings" in spite of what the design of the second logo suggested), with occasional "help" from his [[Nebulan]] companion, [[Hi-Test (G1)|Hi-Test]]. {{storylink|The Wind of Change!}} Dread Tidings ran from issue #184 to issue [[Rhythms of Darkness!|#299]]. Again, there was an issue gap between Grimlock leaving the strip and Dreadwind taking up the strip — the place of the letters page in issue #183 was taken by a special Robo-Capers strip showing Dreadwind taking over the letters.  
[[Dreadwind (G1)|Dreadwind]] took over the page after being swamped by suitcases full of Grimlock's letters. {{storylink|The Wind of Change!}}<ref>[[Source:Dread Tidings#Issue 183|Dread Tidings, issue 183]]</ref> The first instalment of Dread Tidings was printed in [[Space Pirates!|issue 184]]. The main gimmick of Dread Tidings was that the answers would often feature interjections from Dreadwind's [[Powermaster]] partner, [[Hi-Test (G1)|Hi-Test]]; the two hosts were usually distinguished by their text colours, though this practice came to a halt when the page was printed in black and white starting in [[The Primal Scream|issue 260]], with the hosts simply answering questions that were addressed to them individually.


Dread Tidings ran both in colour and in black and white. To distinguish the difference between Dreadwind and Hi-Test, Dreadwind answered in red/pink, while Hi-Test answered in blue. This meant that when the page was published in black and white Hi-Test stopped answering letters for a while.
Dreadwind proved a particularly antagonistic answerer to his readers, who he called "humes", and he would apparently revel in avoiding answering questions directly. The enmity was mutual, as a trend emerged that writers would threaten Dreadwind with violence if their letter wasn't printed; the [[Mecannibal]]s were frequently invoked after Dreadwind and co. fell afoul of them in the comic. {{storylink|Recipe for Disaster!}}


The corner boxes on the covers of issues [[Kings of the Wild Frontier.|#282-285]] feature a sequence where Dreadwind punches out Optimus Prime and steals the corner box from him.
Dreadwind's self importance saw him branch out into the editorial sections of the comic, and a sequence of ident boxes on the covers of issues [[Kings of the Wild Frontier.|282 to 285]] led to him appearing in the corner of the cover for the remainder of his tenure. He had the page redesigned in [[The Fall and Rise of the Decepticon Empire.|issue 213]] so he could print more letters about himself.<ref>[[Source:Dread Tidings#Issue 213|Dread Tidings, issue 213]]</ref> (Sure, the new logo looked like it said "Dread Fidings", but at least they disposed of the stubbie responsible.<ref name=dab>[[Source:Darn 'n' Blast#Issue 300|Transformation, issue 300]]</ref>)


In issue [[The Human Factor!|#302]], despite having been kicked out several issues earlier, Dreadwind was still holed up in the Marvel offices. His final departure was the subject of "[[Dreadwind's Xmas!]]", that year's [[Christmas]] story, a text story on the Transmissions index page. (The smallest, and most half-arsed Christmas effort in the history of the series.) A reader would compare his deposition to the removal of Margaret Thatcher, which is an insult to either Dreadwind or Maggie but we're not sure which. {{storylink|Eye of the Storm|#308 Darn 'n' Blast It}}
After growing increasingly paranoid that the page would be taken from him,<ref>[[Source:Dread Tidings#Issue 290|Dread Tidings, issue 290]]</ref> Dreadwind signed off his final column in [[Rhythms of Darkness!|issue 299]] by barricading himself in his office.<ref>[[Source:Dread Tidings#Issue 299|Dread Tidings, issue 299]]</ref><ref name=dab/>  His presence lingered in the comic for a few weeks, until a Christmas Eve visit from three spirits saw him make tracks back to [[Cybertron (planet)|Cybertron]] to plot revenge. {{storylink|Dreadwind's Xmas!}} He left behind a garishly-decorated office and a solitary picture of a dog with sad eyes.<ref>[[Source:Darn 'n' Blast#Issue 307|Darn 'n' Blast, issue 307]]</ref> The Dread Tidings era ran for a period of 116 issues, or two years and twelve weeks in real time. 104 Dread Tidings features were printed all together – only one more than Grim Grams!
{{-}}
{{-}}


{{anchor|Darn n Blast}}
===Darn 'n' Blast===
[[File:TFUK300 letterspage.jpg|left|upright=0.8|thumb]]
[[File:TFUK300 letterspage.jpg|upright=0.8|This is a serious letters page for serious transforming robot children's toys fans.|thumb]]
*[[Action Master]] [[Blaster (G1)|Blaster]] rounded out the comic's run with '''Darn 'n' Blast''', beginning in issue [[Rhythms of Darkness!|#300]]. Don't ask what happened to Dreadwind's picture of a sad-eyed puppy. Curiously, Blaster took over while his comic counterpart was [[Dark Star|STILL]] [[On the Edge of Extinction!|DEAD,]] though this Blaster explained that he hails from an alternate reality, one where several Transformers (not just Grimlock) became Action Masters.
[[Blaster (G1)|Blaster]] rounded out the comic's run with "Darn 'n' Blast", beginning in the blow-out [[Rhythms of Darkness!|300th issue]] (and also appearing in that issue's ''[[Combat Colin issue 300|Combat Colin]]''). Blaster was an [[Action Master]] from "yet another alternative future" where the Autobots had been reinvigorated by [[Nucleon (substance)|Nucleon]],<ref>[[Source:Darn 'n' Blast#Issue 300|Darn 'n' Blast, issue 300]]</ref> though at least some of this explanation was printed on the page by dumb stubbies, who'd copied it from [[Nucleon (substance)#Toy packaging blurb|a toy box]].<ref>[[Source:Darn 'n' Blast#Issue 303|Darn 'n' Blast, issue 303]]</ref> This alternate future spiel never really played into anything, with Blaster never acknowledging his death in previous issues of the comic, {{storylink|Dark Star}} nor his subsequent resurrection. {{storylink|On the Edge of Extinction!}}
 
Token attempts were made at peppering slang into his responses to try and evoke his bombastic [[The Transformers Universe (Marvel)|''Universe'' profile characterisation]], but Blaster fell into the same trap as Ratchet, not being enough of a bad boy to be entertaining. He even abolished the VVH!<ref>[[Source:Darn 'n' Blast#Issue 308|Darn 'n' Blast, issue 308]]</ref> His answers also left something to be desired, as he was frequently ignorant or unaware about what he was being asked,<ref>[[Source:Darn 'n' Blast#Issue 321|Darn 'n' Blast, issue 321]] and [[Source:Darn 'n' Blast#Issue 328|issue 328]]</ref> and was prone to go off on strange tangents... that is, when his responses didn't tend towards the laconic. One thing he could be relied upon to talk about was [[Mecha-soccer|Cybertronian footie]], which he did on four separate occasions.<ref>[[Source:Darn 'n' Blast#Issue 316|Darn 'n' Blast, issue 316]], [[Source:Darn 'n' Blast#Issue 320|issue 320]], [[Source:Darn 'n' Blast#Issue 326|issue 326]], and [[Source:Darn 'n' Blast#Issue 327|issue 327]]</ref>


During Blaster's run we learned more about his family, and more about [[Mecha-soccer|Transformers soccer leagues]]. Uh. Yay. His tone was much more bright and upbeat than the other letter answerers — resulting in a somewhat more bland set of columns. Ironically, comics Blaster wasn't really a fun and upbeat guy, but that's the UK take for ya.
Like the comic itself, Darn 'n' Blast ended abruptly with [[End of the Road! (US)|issue 332]], with Blaster being overcome with emotion.<ref>[[Source:Darn 'n' Blast#Issue 332|Darn 'n' Blast, issue 332]]</ref> The Darn 'n' Blast era ran for a period of 33 issues; due to the comic going fortnightly from issue 309, this translates to one year and five weeks in real time. 32 Darn 'n' Blast features were printed during this time, leaving Blaster with the highest percentage of attendance of any of the regular hosts.
{{-}}
{{-}}


==Post-Marvel==
==Post-Marvel==
*The later [[Transformers: Armada (Panini)|''Armada'' comic]] from [[Panini]] and both [[Titan Books|Titan]]'s [[Transformers (Titan Magazine)|Movie]] & ''[[Transformers Animated (Titan)|Animated]]'' comics have since used the same format for their letters page.
*The later [[Transformers: Armada (Panini)|''Armada'' comic]] from [[Panini]] and both [[Titan Books|Titan]]'s [[Transformers (Titan Magazine)|live-action movie]] and ''[[Transformers Animated (Titan)|Animated]]'' comics have since featured Transformers hosting the letters pages.
*The various [[Ask Vector Prime]] Q&A interactions are conducted in a similar fashion. At one point, guest columnist Grimlock renamed the feature "Grim Grams" in a presumed nod to this similarity.
*The various [[Ask Vector Prime]] Q&A interactions are conducted in a similar fashion. At one point, guest columnist Grimlock renamed the feature "Grim Grams" in a nod to this similarity.


==See also==
==See also==
Line 82: Line 89:


==References==
==References==
{{reflist}}
{{reflist|3}}


[[Category:Generation 1 media]]
[[Category:Generation 1 media]]
[[Category:Marvel Generation 1 issues| ]]
[[Category:Marvel Generation 1 issues| ]]

Latest revision as of 03:01, 1 February 2025

This article is about the Marvel UK feature with multiple subtitles. For the IDW issue about Soundwave, see Soundwaves (issue). For the Grimlock portion of Ask Vector Prime, see Ask Vector Prime#Grim Grams.
Send a letter to Grimlock, and Grimlock sends a letter to you!

The Marvel UK Generation 1 comic had an interesting approach to fan mail — the letters were answered by Transformers!

Originally the Marvel UK comic's letters pages were a fairly pedestrian affair, occasionally spiced up by a Hasbro employee dropping in to plug toys. However, starting with issue 22, a new take was created with a Transformer answering the letters page in character. By this stage the comic was being printed in a weekly format which, combined with in-character letter answerers, resulted in a very informal, "chatty" interaction with fans. Simon Furman attributes this to Ian Rimmer being trained at IPC Magazines Ltd., where an editorial 'character' who would answer letters was part of the product; on Scream!, for example, where both men had worked, the comic was 'edited' and readers spoken to by Ghastly McNasty[1] who claimed to live and work in IPC's dungeon basement.

While Ian Rimmer came up with the concept, Simon Furman would write the bulk of them and was the man who argued Soundwave, rather than an Autobot, should be the host.[2]

The letters pages created on-going in-jokes, addressed continuity errors and were constantly telling the readers (especially during Grimlock's tenure) to ignore the cartoon because, while it was an amusing diversion, the comics were the real story. It's not every day that a Transformers fiction makes the claim of being more legitimate than another!

There were tips about where to pick up old merchandise, and sightings of new toys. The corner section of the page ran recurring items as well — "Stock Exchange" and "Comic Exchange" let fans swap their toys and comics with each other; other times, a fan might have a "Your Choice" printed – a list of their favourite aspects of the series, be they issue, character, artist and so on.

The letter answerers were also unashamedly biased towards their own factions and generally completely biased towards themselves. They'd often berate or tease letter writers, talk down about the previous columnists or berate the staff of the series itself (in all good fun office banter, out of universe).

Those lucky fans who had a letter printed would receive a free mini-Autobot or, later, a Special Teams toy, as well as a reply from the Transformer in question.

Outside-inside continuity

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The continuity of the letters page is somewhat complicated. Generally the answerers treated themselves as 'in continuity', even if this defied all logic. While the comic had a human production staff (Stubbies) who could be blamed for some gaffes that might occur, the comic was also supposed to portray "real events". Or, as Grimlock put it when a fan tried to blame the writer for Galvatron's rampage:

The story that appears in this comic is an accurate representation of the actual events as they happened. So, just this once, you can't really blame the Stubbies involved. That said, in issue 102 they got it all wrong. Fancy showing Galvatron actually defeating me in battle! Ridiculous![3]

The hosts answered questions and bantered with fans, discussing subjects ranging from Megatron's Cybertronian form (a handheld laser gun)[4] to Optimus Prime's opinion of Mötley Crüe's music (not a fan!).[5] In some cases the letters page is the only canon source for vital information about characters. For example, Chuffer's name comes completely from the letters pages.

The waters of canon were further muddied by the letters pages' interaction with editorial columns and the gag strip, Robo-Capers, which would generally treat the letter answerer as being an employee of Marvel UK, operating out of their offices and interacting with the staff. In an early strip, Soundwave would blow up a Marvel office after one printing mistake too many, and later on, Grimlock would let the fame of being a movie star go to his head. It became something or a tradition for the transition of letter answerers to be depicted in special Robo-Capers strips, though in one case a departure was told in a special festive text story in the editorial slot, and in another, the host was inaugurated by an appearance in Robo-Capers' replacement, Combat Colin.

How this all fits together with the actual comics canon is anyone's guess. The writers merely dramatise the real events, which happen to their Transformer co-workers, who also appear in fourth-wall breaking gag strips published by the same company depicting their career at that company, which also exists in-universe, via comics writer Donny Finkleberg. Even more horrifying is this thought: If the letters pages are canon, that makes every single human who wrote into the pages a canon part of Transformers fiction. Let's... ahhh... let's not start publishing pages about them, though, please. (All right, we'll make one exception.)

Hosts/Page title

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Soundwaves

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Soundwave superior, fanboys inferior.

"Soundwaves" was hosted by... well, Soundwave, beginning in issue 22. Bringing an acidic tone to the letters page, Soundwave would openly compliment his readers' duplicity and encourage them to become loyal Decepticon supporters. He apparently got the job by blackmailing the editor.[6] He took his leave in issue 73 to devote his full attention to crushing the Autobots, having caught wind of a potential Dinobot coup to take the page by force.[7] The changeover of hosts was depicted in a special Robo-Capers strip in issue 74.

Soundwave referred to his readers as "Carbon-Based Units", and the staff at Marvel UK as his "human helpers (ha!)", who he would neuro-shock when they failed him. His main idiosyncrasy was his addition of "puttup!" after names he found distasteful, like Autobot (puttup!) or Optimus Prime (puttup!). The meaning of "puttup" was something of a mystery,[8] with it eventually being revealed as a spit of disgust when Soundwave took aim at Robot Master in the main comic strip Second Generation! – yes, through his faceplate!

The Soundwaves era ran for a period of 53 issues, or about one year and three weeks in real time. 46 Soundwaves features were printed all together, though you could call it 47 depending on if you count the following, guest columnist...

Rat-Chat

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Oh, NOW I get it! Ha ha that's not funny.

Christmas 1985, and the Marvel staffers found their office party had plenty of cassettes but no player – and, in order to make Soundwave amenable, they kept him sufficiently lubricated with high grade oil. Too much oil. Soundwave proved too hungover to answer letters the following day, so the staff picked Ratchet as a fill-in, bringing us "Rat-Chat" in issue 41.[9]

Ratch specifically chose to print letters featuring anti-Decepticon sentiments, complimenting the senders on any insults slung at Soundwave. Alas, he was a bit too nice, and therefore bland, for a letters host, and so Rat-Chat only appeared this once (perhaps due to intervention from Soundwave[10]).

Grim Grams

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That's one helluva letter opener.

Grimlock began hosting "Grim Grams" after storming the building, Robo-Capers issue 74 though he was probably forced to thanks to being underneath an avalanche of Soundwave's unopened mail.[11] Grim Grams began in issue 75, featuring an original header of Big Grim by Will Simpson. It fit awkwardly in a three-column format but it's such a nice picture who'd want to change it?[12]

As a host, Grimlock was open, personable, and genuine, and he addressed his readers as "kid". He was also very knowledgable about the Transformers, providing hundreds of little titbits of information, from the names and alternate modes of otherwise unnamed generic characters to Galvatron's secret weakness: chocolate covered oil drums.[13] (Well, all right – he might have told some tall tales, but at least he was convincing.[14])

Grimlock introduced two key bits of vocab to the lexicon: he referred to the fallible Marvel staffers as Stubbies (usually dumb stubbies), and was particularly bloodthirsty towards them, subjecting them to the variable voltage harness – threats of warming up the VVH for the Stubbies would appear on the letters page for years to come. His influence on the comic extended beyond the letters page, including being allowed to pen a completely unbiased review of The Transformers: The Movie.[15]

Grimlock Grimmed his last Gram in issue 182, citing his frustrations with running the page from his temporary residence of the Moon. Totalled![16] His brief stopover on Earth to hand the page over to its new host was depicted in another special Robo Capers in issue 183. The Grim Grams era ran for a period of 109 issues, or two years and four weeks in real time. 103 Grim Grams features were printed in total.

Dread Tidings

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Dreadwind took over the page after being swamped by suitcases full of Grimlock's letters. The Wind of Change![17] The first instalment of Dread Tidings was printed in issue 184. The main gimmick of Dread Tidings was that the answers would often feature interjections from Dreadwind's Powermaster partner, Hi-Test; the two hosts were usually distinguished by their text colours, though this practice came to a halt when the page was printed in black and white starting in issue 260, with the hosts simply answering questions that were addressed to them individually.

Dreadwind proved a particularly antagonistic answerer to his readers, who he called "humes", and he would apparently revel in avoiding answering questions directly. The enmity was mutual, as a trend emerged that writers would threaten Dreadwind with violence if their letter wasn't printed; the Mecannibals were frequently invoked after Dreadwind and co. fell afoul of them in the comic. Recipe for Disaster!

Dreadwind's self importance saw him branch out into the editorial sections of the comic, and a sequence of ident boxes on the covers of issues 282 to 285 led to him appearing in the corner of the cover for the remainder of his tenure. He had the page redesigned in issue 213 so he could print more letters about himself.[18] (Sure, the new logo looked like it said "Dread Fidings", but at least they disposed of the stubbie responsible.[19])

After growing increasingly paranoid that the page would be taken from him,[20] Dreadwind signed off his final column in issue 299 by barricading himself in his office.[21][19] His presence lingered in the comic for a few weeks, until a Christmas Eve visit from three spirits saw him make tracks back to Cybertron to plot revenge. Dreadwind's Xmas! He left behind a garishly-decorated office and a solitary picture of a dog with sad eyes.[22] The Dread Tidings era ran for a period of 116 issues, or two years and twelve weeks in real time. 104 Dread Tidings features were printed all together – only one more than Grim Grams!

Darn 'n' Blast

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This is a serious letters page for serious transforming robot children's toys fans.

Blaster rounded out the comic's run with "Darn 'n' Blast", beginning in the blow-out 300th issue (and also appearing in that issue's Combat Colin). Blaster was an Action Master from "yet another alternative future" where the Autobots had been reinvigorated by Nucleon,[23] though at least some of this explanation was printed on the page by dumb stubbies, who'd copied it from a toy box.[24] This alternate future spiel never really played into anything, with Blaster never acknowledging his death in previous issues of the comic, Dark Star nor his subsequent resurrection. On the Edge of Extinction!

Token attempts were made at peppering slang into his responses to try and evoke his bombastic Universe profile characterisation, but Blaster fell into the same trap as Ratchet, not being enough of a bad boy to be entertaining. He even abolished the VVH![25] His answers also left something to be desired, as he was frequently ignorant or unaware about what he was being asked,[26] and was prone to go off on strange tangents... that is, when his responses didn't tend towards the laconic. One thing he could be relied upon to talk about was Cybertronian footie, which he did on four separate occasions.[27]

Like the comic itself, Darn 'n' Blast ended abruptly with issue 332, with Blaster being overcome with emotion.[28] The Darn 'n' Blast era ran for a period of 33 issues; due to the comic going fortnightly from issue 309, this translates to one year and five weeks in real time. 32 Darn 'n' Blast features were printed during this time, leaving Blaster with the highest percentage of attendance of any of the regular hosts.

Post-Marvel

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  • The later Armada comic from Panini and both Titan's live-action movie and Animated comics have since featured Transformers hosting the letters pages.
  • The various Ask Vector Prime Q&A interactions are conducted in a similar fashion. At one point, guest columnist Grimlock renamed the feature "Grim Grams" in a nod to this similarity.

See also

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We have a completely transcribed archive of all in-character letters pages. Begin your journey below:

Marvel UK letters page archives

References

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