I, Lowtech

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It is being brought.
It is being brought.
Oh, he's doin' somethin'...

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Transformers Timelines
text story
TransTech

I'm starting with the Man in the Mirror/
I'm asking him to change his ways...
"I, Lowtech"
Publisher Fun Publications
First published September 17, 2008
Written by Trent Troop and Greg Sepelak
Illustration by Nick Roche
Colors by Winston Bolen
Continuity TransTech
Page count 47

A high-ranking TransTech businessman finds himself inexplicably trapped inside a lowtech body, and will stop at nothing to regain what is rightfully his.

Synopsis

Events from the prologue are in italics

Inside a dampened room, Cheetor and Stungun interrogate a damaged and uncooperative suspect. The mech demands to see his solicitor, but Stungun tells him that mouthpiece doesn't have the clearance. Cheetor tells the unbelieving suspect that according to the Barax Act, his legal counsel can get his information...so long as he testifies to the police investigation. The outraged suspect refuses, and Cheetor, content to wait, sets up a datacon, playing back the damaged and fragmented memories of one Bulletbike...

(Numbers indicate order of appearance.)

Quotes

"Who are you?"
"Officer Blastcharge, but if you don't get up in the next cycle, it's going to be 'Sir Please Stop Thumping Me Across The Alleyway.'"

Bulletbike & Blastcharge trade pleasantries


"Good day, friend, welcome to Swindle, Swindle and Swindle. I'm Swindle the Second, but you can call me Swindle. This here is Swindle the Third, but you can call him Swindle too. What can we do ya for?"

—A Swindle greets his new customer


"And exactly where were you during Bulletbike's rampage and the solar cycles leading up to it, Commander Cheetor? Do you routinely allow murderers to wander your precinct unmolested?"
"Just off the top of my processor... the Gutcruncher rebellion and the ongoing black market raids, two riots, the incident with General Demolishor, sixteen murders unrelated to this case, twelve armed robberies, three major traffic snarls, fifty-six minor accidents, and four inter-faction rumbles. Plus, all the times the Senate has 'requested' my personal appearance. We're stretched thin even with the assistance of the Freelance Police Legion. If we're pointing servos, however, border security, which is under your jurisdiction, was egregiously lax in investigating Ego's transport. Personally, I'd be worried about what else is slipping through."
"That matter is being investigated, I assure you."

Starscream and Cheetor discuss a typical week in the Offworlder Zones


"If Bulletbike is what can happen when the system fails... why take the risk in voluntarily removing [the clarity codecs]?"
"Did you know that some organics willingly ingest non-lethal doses of deadly poisons?"
"Uh, no, sir?"
"It's to build up an immunity. Small, careful doses. Their body learns to fight it. Eventually, they can handle amounts that would, under normal conditions, kill them. So, think of this as building up an immunity to the urge to kill."
"I... guess that makes sense, sir. But I lost my temper with those two grease-stain chiselers, what if..."
"Don't worry, I wanted to knock their smug little heads together too. Millions of supposedly 'lower' mechanoids in this city have gone gigavorns without crossing the line. We're supposed to be 'transcendent'... if we need some piece of code implanted in us to foster basic morality, then what's the point? The trick isn't not having those feelings, Stungun. It's learning how to handle them. We augment the body, but not the spark. That takes hard work. ...besides, if you crossed that line, you'd be wearing a restraining bolt before you hit the ground."

Stungun and Cheetor

Notes

Continuity notes

Transformer references

Real-world references

  • The title is probably a reference to Isaac Asimov's famous story collection, I, Robot. While I, Robot is not the first appearance of the "I, Noun" formulation (I, Claudius, for example), it's certainly the most famous involving robots. (I, Robot-Master! is a much clearer case.)
  • The plush lizard in Ego's office is the Winslow, a central MacGuffin of Phil Foglio's "Buck Godot: Zap Gun For Hire" comics.
  • At one point Bulletbike thinks that the force of a Vehidrone's voice is "one degree shy of sadistic", a line from the song "SenSurround" by They Might Be Giants.
  • Bulletbike also notes that the Vehidrone has a "WVNG-class voice modulator", which might be a reference to Hugo Weaving.
  • "Isen Power Station" and a "D-wy warehouse district" are mentioned as places Vehidrones can be found, a possible reference to a certain pair of Animated creators.
  • While talking to Ego. Bulletbike apparently says he works in 'murders and executions', which Ego responds with he also worked in 'mergers and acquisitions', mirroring a scene from the horror film American Psycho.

Errors

  • The data-con is referred to as a datacon, missing the hyphen.